August 25, 2010
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Inrernet Island Topic Post #36: Strengths/Weaknesses
Internet Island Topic Post #36: Strengths/Weaknesses?
The Internet Island is back! And I am posting the following blog entry for the Island. You know, sometimes I just want to kick back and enjoy life, watch a movie, and take a nap. And other times I want to write, to visit my fellow bloggers, and to get involved. The Internet Island was pretty active for over two years, and it's been about two years since I've taken a stroll along it's beaches. The link above takes you to the Internet Island site, where hopefully we will get some more essays about humanity's strengths and weaknesses from the personal experiences of the Islanders. You too, of course can participate and you will become a denizen of the Internet Island.
36.1 Do you have any strengths which could be considered to be weaknesses? How about perceived weaknesses which you believe to be strengths.?
Our moral and ideological makeup is what determines our status as human beings. We make choices throughout our lives which define us and form opinions which give us our gravitas. We are the sum total of our experiences, observations, and emotions. We feel, we dream, we think.
We. Are. Human.And as humans, we develop great strengths and great weaknesses. Can our strengths ever be considered to be weak? Could the weakest link in our consciousness really be a great strength unbeknownst to us?
These questions I ponder daily, as I make my rounds through life. I believe life gives us the signposts and the clues, the wherewithal and the gumption, to get through by ourselves, and with our fellow humans' help, any calamity or conundrum.
Each part of life is made up of a dichotomy, and I've written about these dichotomies of life before. For each positive, there is a negative, and sometimes the perception of one individual is completely reversed from what another individual perceives. This is what makes life infinitely interesting, and why the world is such a grand and diverse place.
Can a moral or ideological strength in fact be a weakness? Let's ponder our own makeup, and then look at the bigger picture.
I have always maintained that I'm an honest individual. I never lie. I was raised in an atmosphere, where honesty was always the best policy. As I age, and as others pass into my sphere of recognition, I never waver in my quest to keep the conversation true, and to never make any statements of observations which do not, from my perception anyway, contain complete veracity.
Sometimes this trait, which I have always considered a great strength, can become a weakness and get me in trouble.
That's because truth can also be mindlessly stated, or too obviously stated, and directed at the wrong times to certain people. I don't go up to a large person and tell them they are fat. I believe this is rude and unnecessary. However, my friends have more than once declared that I am "truthful to the point of tactlessness."
Veracity: Strength. Tactlessness: A weakness.
I try to watch my mouth. But sometimes I've been known to let out some zinger. I still don't like how some friends/family members/workmates will attempt to hide certain opinions/observations/emotions from some people, and confide these same conditions in others. Sometimes they do not tell one person that another is not supposed to be privy to some piece of information they impart. I always make a point to let new folks in my orbit know that I speak honestly, and if you do not tell me deliberately not to impart information you give me to another party, then I might just let my loose lips sink some ship, if you follow my drift.
Of course, this can get quite unmanageable when one person is such a bullsh**er or liar that he tells so many different stories that he can't keep them straight himself, he should never expect me to do so. My weakness is my strength, however, and I believe that others should just be transparent, open, and free in thier opinions. That's the way I am, and so far in over a half century on this planet, I haven't had too many problems.
Can a moral or ideological weakness in fact be a strength? Let's ponder our makeup again, and look outside the box.
The other night I witnessed an auto accident. I was on the corner, turning right, two blocks from the mobile home park, when a car making a left turn on the other side of the street legally, smashed into a car speeding through the red light the other way. They almost T Boned, and the sound of crunching metal is one of the most terrible sounds I've ever heard.
One of my weaknesses is that I sometimes just don't want to "get involved". At my place in the game of life, I've played quite a few hands, and sometimes I just want to take a pass. On the other hand, one of my strengths is my sense of calm during times of great distress. I was able to calm Joel down when Bob died, for instance, and once when my brother went completely mental after he slammed his Pinto into a pole in a parking lot, I was able by sheer strength of will to calm him down.
During and immediately after the accident, I was stuck three, then two cars behind others making a right turn. None of them stopped to see what happened in the wreck. I looked at the participants. The gal who ran the red light got out of her car first, cellphone in hand. The other guy didn't yet emerge from his car, but he looked okay through the windshield. My weakness of not wanting to get involved caused me, along with all the cars ahead and behind me, to make our right turn without stopping to see what was going on.
Was I right to do this? On a movie I watched today, about men on a cattle drive, called Cowboy, Jack Lemmon plays a greenhorn who has partially financed Glenn Ford's drive, and comes along. In one scene, a cowboy makes advances on another guy's wife in a bar in Mexico, and some caballeros are going to beat him up outside the bar. Lemmon's character wants to help somehow, but Ford's convinces him (after a physical brawl) that men make their own way through life, and need to experience their own mistakes, so it's best not to get involved.
Was Lemmon or Ford in the right in this instance? Who was the stronger or purpose? Who was the weaker? Or does anyone know.
Since I don't carry a cellphone, I didn't think I could really be of any help. I've been a witness before, and it sometimes takes a while before the cops will let you go. I believe my weakness for not getting involved was a strength in this particular instance. Just like I think Lemmon shouldn't have gone back to help the cowboy who got himself into trouble.
Cowardness: Weakness. Patience: A virtue.
Perhaps my weaknesses and strengths are built on common sense, and perhaps they are not. Life is fickle, and the game tends to change. We learn one set of rules to see them reversed in the next round of play. Life isn't a videogame, and we don't collect any coins when we vanquish the wrongheaded or the unfaithful.
Do you have any stories of weakness which turned out to be a strength, or vice versa? If so, then please visit the Internet Island, and when you have posted your story, leave a link in comments on the site. I wrote this stream of consciousness prior to going to bed, and will check for errors in grammar and spelling tomorrow.
Comments (80)
Sounds like we each have similar strengths/weaknesses...although if I'm given a direct, "NOBODY is to know about this...", I've been known to specifically not remember a given bit of information - even when revisiting the topic by the person in question. ["Huh? OH YEAH, I remember now...what you said not to talk about...right...]
Unfortunately, I'm also one of those who, when a girl asks if a given dress makes her look fat, I'll explain precisely where the item in question is unflattering. I try to phrase it so it doesn't bite - but I'm not the greatest at that part of it...eesh...
Many of the coins we get in this game of Life comes not in cents, but in sense...and the more common sense you collect, the more you can [hopefully] share - thus doubling the points score.
That's how I see it. Yeah...I've not been around here for a while...I've sort of had to distribute the coins for bonus value, offline - and only just recently earned enough tokens to play here for a limited time
Well written, and I like your web comic, too - have you decided to start making that one a feature, too? I got a kick out of your college-days comics, and I'm curious as to how you'd revisit some of the material [like the one about the haircut dress code issue...I wonder how that character would get around these days?]
At any rate, well written post. Sorry to take up so much real estate on your site on the reply. Eh...
I used to be very much like that, to the point that I would actually correct people about things, even minor things. In retrospect, I think I had this all tied up with being completely truthful. This will not endear you to many people, but I didn't even realize that this was an undesirable trait for a very long time. However, then I discovered I could combine this with TACTFULNESS, and that has carried me much further. It still seems wrong, sometimes, but I know it is a much better response in the long run.
I can understand your reluctance to get involved in an accident, but sometimes it would be the only way to have justice prevail. People can be so darn slippery! Recently my daughter was in an accident, and although it was not her fault, the other drivers admitted fault, and it was documented by the police, she was STILL called to court...as a witness! As a victim, she suffered far more than the people who were at fault, which does not seem fair. I think that in some states, though, if you observe an accident you are required to stay and tell what you saw. It might be an inconvenience at the time, but if you were involved in an accident, and the only "proof" you could offer that you were not at fault was the story of an eyewitness, wouldn't you be glad of anyone who stepped forward?
Hurrah that the Island has arisen from the depths once again!
Where's the original topic post? I saw it when I was signed in under the FG account but now I can't find it...
@radicalramblings - Dear Wendi, (Cue Twilight Zone music) I'm using the title card to promote it. It's on the Internet Island blogsite, of course. This is my entry for the topic, which is presented in a link above and below the entry, as usual. I sent a message to the Islanders from the Island account, but since I run the Island, and it's been shut down for over two years, I ALSO sent a copy of the message to my own subs/friends, and that message contained a URL (Xanga messages don't allow for HTML coding) to the Internet Island site. MFN/ppf
Welcome back, welcome back, welcome baaaaack.
the island is calling me
Great picture...you share an interesting similarity to Ricardo M!!
*claps loudly* bravo!!!!
I was left wondering what I would do in a case of witnessing an accident. Perhaps, if I were not a physician, mayyyy be, just may be, would have probably walked on or driven on. ( you noticed how I dragged my feet about that though! ) But there is something in my heart, that when I see something like that happening, and believe me I have see some, i am there, kneeling beside them and working with them. I cannot say the same about Mohamed though. He would really rather not get involved at all.
But then I suppose, to each his own. I am happy with what I do, and by doing that, I find strength in my weakness
Michael. Thanks for your visit. I left a reply to you on my site, so I could tie it in with your comment. In case you don't get alerted to @someone, I'll let you know that I have sometimes used the automatic transfer of my blog to FB, so they can be read there, too; but I don't do that with man. Also, I'm not sure I know about "places" on FB, so you may need to send me a message to tell me more about that.
Well, Internet Island is way cool, I think; but since my computer was gone overnight at Comp USA and I didn't get it back until late this afternoon, I am behind on the stuff I usually need to get done on it. It's an interesting topic on which to post, so I may have to revist when I have more time to digest all of it. From the bits that I did read, I expect it to be very thoughtfully and well written.
~~Blessings 'n Cheers
Dear friend,
I am happy that you have revived Internet Island, and saddened beyond words that you have vowed to never resurrect Electric Poetry. I'm sure there is plenty I don't know about what went on with its demise, but I also know it was the best poetry group I've ever been a part of, so I hope you will forgive me being deeply hurt to know it will never return.
I have been busy in my here-and-now life, which has kept me away from Xanga. But honestly, it's also because of Facebook, and I'm not entirely certain that's a good thing. I don't feel as creative any more, and I don't like that. I'm teaching my own two high schoolers and tutoring two 4th-graders in the mornings, so I'm grateful to be fulfilling my longing to teach. I am also grateful to still have my afternoons free to tend the house, bake bread (daily), spend time with my family, and have dinner on the table soon after my husband gets home from work. Only our youngest two teens remain at home. Our "baby" son will be 18 in March and will graduate from high school the following May just as our daughter (the baby of our family) turns 16. Life is changing a little too rapidly lately, but not all of it is so poignant. Our second son's wife gave birth to our precious little granddaughter Belle a month ago.
Thank you for your compliment on my writing. I have always enjoyed yours, and will do my best to continue to read you wherever and as often as I can. I don't write nearly as much any more, but I'd like to go back to being a bit more prolific. It could happen.
Love you,
Blue
OKay Mike I was so inspired by your visit to my lonely little site that I responded to your Internet Island Post. I dont' remember how to link to it anymore though. You may have to visit my site to read it. Oh what a shame. LOL By the way. I loved the picture you posted awhile ago. Nice looking man. I should have responded at the time.
How are things going for you? I started a new job back in February after being off work for several months. Was a traumatic experience being off work so I have overcompensated a little with the new job. Been working way too much. I will make time to visit your site again though. I have missed your messages and your posts. Thanks for starting the Island up again. I may need a review on linking but I do appreciate the kick in the pants.
Hugs and Best Wishes
Kat
You want me to think. Help! I'm used to make short comments without thinking to much. Would that be a weakness,? Or just lazy?
I think we should not take this character specificities as weakness or strenght, but what for they are: part of our being. We are acting in a normal society and the moral is much different if you are in a necessity enviroment, where life and death are very close, and depend on a little detail, than, morality changes completely.
I don't agrre too much on moral strenght or ideological weakness, I would try to bring all this back to a individual way of life. I help someone if he needs it, and if I can help. In the case of the car accident, would you be able to help? or not? Jus tbe there to watch?
The guy who was getting beaten up, well, he had it coming. I'm against violence so, perhaps I would have told the guys don't beat him, but not more than that. ( You don't you to get in a fight if you are against violence, do you? But it depends on the moment, on the mood. Most of the time I don't know why I react in a certain way and not in the other.
Conclusion: I think strenght and weakness are like medals having two sides and witch side will be cast, depends on the moment and of the individuality of the actors
Sorry. I did my best.
Browsing and enjoying your site. You live in such a beautiful area, your pictures are great.
Honestly, I'd probably try to help out if there was an accident, if I saw it infront of me (and since I don't drive..that won't happen. My bf would probably turn the other way or he may never notice? He never does!). Though I've been honest when it comes to people and what they are going through. I just think lying to them won't do any good and it would do only harm. Though I admit I get in trouble with my honestly as well. I guess people don't like the truth very much? That's what I noticed with some people. As if the truth will hurt them.
I just try to do what I can for that person or for myself. My mother raised me in that same manner, never to lie but I found that maneuvering through life, you have to learn to lie a bit. I have a lot of weaknesses...but I don't mind them because I feel quite human by them. I feel like a well rounded person with them.
Sometimes our biggest strengths can be our weaknesses as well..it just depends on the situation in life etc;
Dear Mike,
I grew up with the phrase "your greatest gift is also your greatest weakness" being repeated to my sisters and I on a regular basis. At first I snorted, and shrugged it off. What did my mother know? My greatest gift is my way with words, and how could the ability to manipulate the English language to say exactly what I want to say ever be a weakness? The first time I got angry enough with someone to ignore my natural impulse to remain calm and work out the situation rationally, I learned my lesson. What I said to her that day is probably my only regret in life, and that's saying quite a bit given the mistakes I've made. I try to be the kind of person who views mistakes as learning opportunities. What I learned from her is to be careful with my words, because they have just as much power for evil as they do for good. Two years later, we're starting to build a friendship again. Before that fight, we had been very close. What she said to get me that angry was thoughtless, and easily forgiven. What I said was considered, and cruel, because I wanted to hurt her like she had hurt me. Unfortunately, I went much too far.
Khai
It's been so long, I hope I remember how to link: I am here at writergoddess.xanga.com
If it doesn't work, HELP?????
also here is the post:
Weaknesses? Ah yes, there are so many of them. I am speaking of character weaknesses, naturally, although I used to be a strong woman, physically; some said I was an Amazon which I took as a compliment. Anyway, funny that this subject should come up because my “word of the day” according to the Merriam Webster online dictionary is milquetoast….based on a character (you’re gonna’ love this Mike) Casper Milquetoast…you may already know him. I knew of the term but I hadn’t met Casper until this morning. This my friends, is my greatest weakness, I believe. At least it was until I grew up, learned a few lessons the hard way, and no longer cared so much what people thought.
Maybe it wasn’t so much a weakness, maybe it was more innocence than anything but I always had a hard time standing up for myself and believed in the goodness of people. I didn’t think anyone was mean. I was very shy as a child, and got married right out of high school to a man who was controlling, self centered and violent. This treatment obliterated any shred of self confidence I may have had. I then, out of desperation to get out of my miserable marriage I joined a cult. The leader of this cult was also controlling. Although his control wasn’t as direct or unkind, he still expected to be obeyed. I was very good at not making waves, so I fit right in. Except I wasn’t happy.
I let people walk all over me; I did whatever was asked of me; including having sex which wasn’t particularly fulfilling or enjoyable. I rarely spoke my true thoughts. Instead I would bottle up my emotions until, on certain occasions they would come bursting forth in anger and tears. This would surprise whomever I was talking to because I was usually so mild mannered and ridiculously apologetic. I would apologize for things that were not my fault or even vaguely related to my situation.
I suppose that out of this weakness was born strength. How else do you know how strong you are unless you have been tested? I am now an outspoken woman, and although I am still kind, my communications are way more direct and I don’t bottle up my feelings.
I always loved that show. Ricardo Montaban was truly one of the greatest actors of his time!
When commenting on your site, am I supposed to start off with "Dear Mike" and leave some kind of signature like your iconic "Philosopher/fool" sig?
@ZSA_MD - Dear Zakiah, I actually wrote this pretty quickly, and there might have been a better example than an accident. My point is that sometimes by acting too quickly we might cause troubles, when if we practice patience, it might be better if we had waited before acting.
@Ladyblue - Dear Lisa, I should never say never. I'm don't use Yahoo groups so if I did resurrect ElectricPoetry I would do it here, sort of like a participatory blogring/site. I did set up an ElectricPoetry blogring, and I announced it on several entries, but only got 9 or so members, and those people probably don't use Xanga anymore. My memories of the group aren't as positive as yours. There were some terrible poets. One gal kept posting the same poem over and over again. It was like Sisyphus rolling that rock uphill every time I moderated.
@carlo Dear Carlo, I offer a lot of disparate types of entries. This is a topic entry for a blogring I recently started up again. You don't have to participate. LOL. You can just write "nice entry". But thank you so much FOR participating, and for such a thoughtful outlook on the subject!
@mammaquiet - Dear Sharon, You've supposed to supply the info on your entry over at the Internet Island site, but that's okay. I'm the same guy. So I linked you over there. -
@quodmenutriut - Dear Khai, I love your input. This comment could have been an entry for the topic on the blogring site, located HERE. What a great bit of advice from your mother. An older aquaintence of mine told me when I was in my 20s that I was going to have a "realization" when I turned about 40 that was going to explain much to me. I didn't know what he meant. By the time I'd packed a couple more decades on my belt, I not only knew, but understood. Now I use the term "realization" in my writings about the Universal Mind to describe the signposts life attempts to show us. Sometimes it takes a little time, but eventually, if we're quick enough we understand, and 'realize' what life is teaching us.
@nidan - Dear Jimmy, Of course not. I always get tickled when correspondents "mimic" my letter writing style, however.
@baldmike2004 - Dear Mike,
RYC to Jimmy, I'm glad that you get tickled when your letter writing style is mimicked, because I sort of do it naturally. I figure if you're writing like that, its because that's how you find it easiest to read. I want to be clear and have easily read comments. RYC to me, this is the first time I've been intrigued enough by the term "Universal Mind" to want to go find out more about it. Rest assured that this weekend, when I have more time, I'll be floating around your writings, pondering. I may not comment much, until I'm sure of what I think, but I'm very intrigued.
Khai
@quodmenutriut - Khai, you're fast becoming one of my favorite Xangans and I don't believe I even knew who you were up until a few weeks ago. Start with my Universal Blog tag on Xanga. And of course everything leads eventually to my personal website http://www.allthingsmike.com, which I might have to terminate at the end of next month, if I can't afford to pay for the subscription another year.
@baldmike2004 - Mike, why am I becoming a favorite xangan? Because I care to read your stuff?
@baldmike2004 - I remember exactly who you're talking about, and I agree, she was seriously exhausting. For me, the good so far outweighed the bad, but then you poured SO much time and energy into the group, responding to everyone and helping them become better poets. How draining that must have been. I'm not angry about the loss...just sad.
Hugs,
Blue
Very interesting topic, Mike! I think my strength is my honesty. I do try to be as open as I possibly can with people, but in saying this, I have been known to "bend" the truth a little for fear of hurting people's feelings. This is only done if they ask me a question and my honest answer would result in them being hurt. In this case I'll "skirt" around my opinion.
It's also funny how when put to the test, the weaknesses we think we have can turn out to be infact our strengths!
No, I've not written any blogs since July. Just haven't felt like writing really. Thanks so much for your comment!
This was a hard topic to come up with anything to write about.
Great topic, Mike. I enjoyed reflecting on the topic and writing on my xanga. I'm one of those former islanders who left the island (and xanga) for a few years but felt compelled to return (kind of sounds like a great script for a hit tv show, doesn't it. Anyway, I'd love to set up links but can't follow your instructions or figure it out on my own. http://thepictureofme.xanga.com/732586865/internet-island-post-topic-36/
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