July 2, 2010
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Essay: We are Special
We are Human. We are Special. We are Individual. We are Connected.
I read a comment on my latest entry. "I have no skills." I remember reading a blog entry a while back from a gal who considered herself "broken" and was irked at people who tried to "fix" her. When I wrote my "open letter to anyone thinking about suicide" I received some comments from people who felt anyone "criticizing" someone thinking about offing themselves was wrong, because some people just feel so bad they'd be better off dead. Back when I created the Internet Island blogring, I proclaimed that we were all special, and I can remember debating one young gal who didn't want to be a part of the group because she didn't think she was special.
We all have skills, although we might not exercise them. A lot of us are "broken" but if we fail to "fix" ourselves, (and really, we're the only ones who can do this,) then it's our fault. Nobody should feel so bad as to think they have to end their life. And finally, we're all "special."
I've been around for quite a while. I'll admit, perhaps I was given special powers from the Universal Mind back when I was young, because I've felt special all my life. I've always felt I possess some kind of gift which doesn't make me any better than anyone else, but maybe creates for me a set of answers that soothe and placate my wildest questions. And believe me, throughout my life, I've had lots of questions. When people keep dropping dead around you, and bad luck seems to follow you around like the plague, questions about life and it's meaning abound. However, when I stopped to think, or even to just relax and let the Universal permeate my being, I realized that the answers exist, and have always existed, and that's why I think I've been given a gift of perception which perhaps doesn't exist in the lives of most people.
If I have this gift, then I should, and have been, throughout my life, willing to share it and to give it to others.
Back in the 7th and 8th grade, when I wasn't being chased around the schoolyard or stuffed into trash cans by bullies, I would "analyze" my friends. Throughout my young life, I was sort of a "Dear Abby" in my group. Fellow students arnd friends would tell me their troubles, and I would attempt to solve them. It probably isn't a stretch to realize that for most of my young life I wanted to grow up to be a pastor. I could picture myself at a pulpit telling my congregation they had nothing to worry about.
As I say, I have had lots of questions about this existence. At the same time I was performing as "Dear Abby" in school, I felt I couldn't solve any of my own problems. "I'm such a bad analyst" I wrote in an early poem, "when I analyze myself".
I could say I have no skills, because there are others with far better skills. I could say I'm broken. My sister claims our super strict mother "abused" us, because she practiced the "spare the rod and spoil the child" theory of child rearing.I could say I'm not special. And if you've been reading this blog long enough, you know I harbored suicidal thoughts during my 20s right after my parents died.
Living a bit of life gives one perspective, which young people fail to realize. Those who think life has dealt them the wrong hand simply have to stay in the game a little longer. We lose. We win. We are right. We are wrong. It seems so simple sometimes, and sometimes it's incredibly difficult. When an older person scolds someone younger for dwelling to deeply on something the older person feels is insignificant, perhaps the older person just can't remember how significant these problems felt when they were themselves younger.
A young person has only lived a finite amount of time, and their experience isn't as great as one who has gained a few decades.
I've often written about "life realizations" and about how some people are merely part of the scenery of their lives, while some of us carry around our own paintbrushes. The sad fact of life is that for many, they fade into that scenery, and they don't think they matter. The "specialness" that is inherent in their lives, the skills they have never cultivated, the sadness they seem to always feel is always at the fore, and for some, they never get the encouragement from their family and peers that they deserve.
I'm here to tell you that you are all special. WE are all special. We are a small part of the wonderful force of humanity. We are surrounded by obstacles, and negativity. We are inundated with conflicting signposts. Some times we don't know what to make of it all.
We shouldn't have to have suffered a near death experience in order to appreciate the sunrise. Each day dawns with opportunity and promise.
Be optimistic. Perhaps you'll find your skills, your specialness, and your life force, and you might find that you can fix anything you find that's "broken." To quote the "prophet" Mick Jagger, "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometime, you may find that you get what you need."
Posted: June 30, 2010 7:23 AM
Comments (21)
Full of wisdom.
I agree with you. How do you argue with people who say, "If we're all special, then isn't nobody special?" It stems from a desire for people to be better than others, which is part of the human condition (and the reason for the civilization I'm sort of railing against). It's an interesting idea.
Opportunity and promise -- a wonderful perspective, Mike.
I'm sort of the Dear Abby in my group of friends. I don't mind the position as I'm always happy to try and help.
You are a special person Mike. You have shown us many of your talents and shared with us much of yourself. I wish more people will read this and take it at heart. Your header caught my eye and says it all. If we can see our individuality and connectedness at the same time we are on he brink of evolving as mankind.
It's a daily struggle to keep myself optomistic. I've always been this way. Don't read too much into my words Mike. I remember writing I have no skills yesturday. I really can't think of anything that is a skill except maybe my stubborness to keep going.
you said it all right there in the title WE are in this together
:sunny: good post
You are the "wisdom guru".
Sound advice, but of course just what I would expect to get at your blog. Neat profile pic, Mike.
You are definitely special. Some people just have a gift for helping others. Peace to you.
Good show, sir! Especially liked the bit with the artist/life metaphor... classic, but still very applicable.
Great post, Mike, and I agree with you.
Someone whom I admire at lot for her musical talents, and whom I consider as a personal friend told me recently, "you are special". I don't think I was being arrogant or egotistical when I replied that I thought I was. I can say that because I believe that all of us are special in some way. I think it needs to be recognized and celebrated. If we have weakness(es) in some areas, we can either work to overcome, or we can turn our attention elsewhere to find our strength(s). I have a friend who turns her negatives or weaknesses into positives, making her empathic to others, to encourage and help them.
I believe that, although I might compare myself to others and acknowledge that others have more musical talent than I have, I will not allow it to keep me from pursuing opportunities to entertain others with songs and stories. Talents, skills, strengths (and sometimes weaknesses) are God's gifts to be shared and not "hidden under a bushel" as The Record would express it.
Again, a great post, and thank you for reminding me.
~~Blessings 'n Cheers :goodjob:
I can't put myself in this mind set today, but this is a good read. I hope that others can find it helpful... I'm sure that they will.
It's easy to forget this, especially when repeatedly situations suggest you aren't good enough. Thanks for the reminder.
You, my good man, has great vault of wisdom, and it's good that you share your wisdom to the others.
AMAZING MIKE! I AM GOING TO SHOW THIS TO SOMEONE WHO IS IN NEED OF THE PICK ME UP. YOU ARE VERY SPECIAL, DONT EVER CHANGE A THING! :love:
Mike, you probably have had an impact on the thinking of more of us than you realize. Here's an example of another such impact:
Some years ago my wife suffered a major panic attack as part of her PTSD, and was admitted to the "Stress management" (psychiatric) wing of the local hospital. While there she underwent several sessions of group therapy. Some of her fellow patients were suicidal and she found herself (she is a natural born teacher) taking charge of the therapy sessions persuading them of how much they had to look forward to - My wife was by far the oldest person in the sessions (76) and her comments were treated with some respect. The counselor at the sessions was much amused. My wife was discharged after only a few days and marks this as a major turning point in her long trip toward resolution of her problems. Now, eight years later, she is wheelchair bound and her eyesight has declined so that she can no longer read (a major blow to her) but she still retains a mostly optimistic outlook.
I also have some health problems, but she remains a major inspiration to me.
Very well written and very applicable. So much of this speaks to me of my own life. Thank you for sharing this.
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