September 14, 2009
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ElectricPoetry: Aging Backwards/Anxiety Attacks
Aging Backward/Anxiety Attacks
Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
9/14/09 7:00a.m. pdtPost operation, hip replaced, leg sewn up
After the antibiotic regimen completed
Exercising not only the leg and hip,
But a new sense of common regular
Regimentation
Compounded with a healthy diet
More power walks at sunset
Enjoying the fading light and the life
While hopefully hoping the life will not fade
As it did for past friends in their twilight
Even as they were as surprised at life's end
As I
The last conversations were never discussed
The last wishes were never divulged
But I scream daily into the ether
Either complacently relegating this anxious aging
To the backburner of healthy heroics
Or feeling the burn of pained muscles
Which give pause, and give cause
For medicative Ibuprofen and Acetiminaphen COD
Temporarily alleviating the perception of pain
Even as I push myself harder and harder
In this feeble attempt to stave off the inevitablePre operation, pre anxious aging,
When time flowed slower, and
The sands never seemed to hit
The bottom of the glass.
Those were the days, erratic ways
Withdrawn and withering
Elevating youthful ignorance
And hedonistic hungering
To, if not a science,
At least a science fiction
Where age would never enter
Into the equation,
Or at least not for a long while.That while, and the wiles of youthful expedience
Came by the calendar much quicker than I supposed
Or those who lost their lives as well as their youth
Supposed,
And now I suppose,
As the hands tremble
And the tan fades,
And the muscles give pained allegiance
To mortality,
That I cannot simply age backwards
Like the characters in films,
Because I have not the special effects.
The effect is clearly evident,
And age affects this life.
I only have this life,
This hopeful, ancient life,
I only have this mind,
This anxious, fretting mind,
Keeping me up nights,
Nights which would otherwise be occupied
by sleeping soundly through the hours.Insomniac anxiety
Illusive youth
Ever increasing pain,
Yet each day, power walking into the sunset
And thankful for yet another day of this life...
BEHIND THE POETRY: It's been a few months since I've sat down to pen a few lines of poetry, and I'm really pretty pleased with this one. I'm not really attempting any "universality" here. I used to write purely personal stream of conscious pieces describing where I was at emotionally at the point in time I wrote the poem. This is a new poem which has been kicking around in my head for a few days. Well, truthfully, only the first part of the title, and the idea of how my healthy regimen has had me feeling more youthful as of late. Then last night, I was hit with a terrible bout of insomnia, and this morning, I came up with the flip side of the idea, how even though I'm attempting to become more youthful, I am in fact getting older, and can never stop this from happening. I don't think it's a negative poem, and has some interesting wordplay and imagery. Since I take my walks for cardiovascular exercise in the evenings, I am literally "power walking into the sunset", and figuratively, into the sunset of my life. Hopefully, this will be the first of another wave of new poems, as happened in the early part of the year. I did write a poem when I was in the hospital in June, but I wrote it on paper, and never transcribed it into the computer. MFN/ppf
Comments (57)
you're a very good poet.
The sunset is often the best part of the day. May you walk till the end with power.
hi mike, glad your recovery is going so well. i too am dumbfounded by the illusion of eternal youth, and remain thankful for each present of the moment. sunset time does seem especially poignant. nice poem.
Having read some of your earlier poetry, which I enjoyed, I think that this poem is even better. I can identify with this, which probably means it speaks to me that much more!
Hope you are making some good progress with your healing!
excellent.
Great poem...great images! I love the last few lines. Aging isn't for sissies, as they say. And we're all aging. I just turned 54 in Sept. I can't believe how fast the years have flown! But I'm enjoying this stage of my life. Glad to be alive!!!!!!!!
Where in CA do you live?! I've lived in CA!
I'm a hugger, so watch out!!!! HUGE HUGS to you!!
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