February 7, 2006
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Internet Island Topic Entry: "The Dichotomy of Life"
A topic entry for the Internet Island Topic Post 6.00
A child is born
Another one dies
Somebody laughs
And somebody cries
Merriment, happiness
Sadness and gloom
All manner of emotion
from gladness to doom
Mixed in the blender
Felicity, strife
We have ups and downs
The dichotomy of life
"There's good news and bad news...Whattaya wanna hear first?"From the moment we are born, to our final breath of life, our existence is filled with the presence of great happiness, great sadness, accomplishments, disappointments. The good exists with the bad. Fear follows fulfillment. In Christian mythology, the first humans, Adam and Eve, lived in Paradise, a place where such dichotomy did not exist. Their lives were perfect, but they were not satisfied with this perfection. Jehovah placed in the center of Paradise a Tree of Knowledge of the Difference Between Good and Evil. Goaded by the Snake, Eve persuaded Adam to taste of this knowledge, and the two were bansihed from Paradise forever. Human existence since then has been filled with this "knowledge" and this "knowledge" is what differentiates for us these disparate slivers of feelings.
In Eastern religions, the forces of yin and yang govern the order of the universe. One cannot definitely experience true enlightenment if one has not sampled the agonies of existence firsthand. Some lives are lived over and over again until enlightenment is attained. This is our test. Our lives are filled with the often conflicting experiences of existence. When a life is over, the rest of us grieve for that life. When the life has begun we celebrate, and a part of that celebration is carried over into our grief when that life ends. There are diseases of the brain, like bipolarity, which tends to give certain people great mood swings which imprints happiness and sadness equally and indiscriminately into their lives sometimes so close together that they appear to be happening at the same time.
Life is not fair, nor is it perfect. And that lack of perfection and fair play is what makes it infinitely interesting.
My personal existence is rife with examples of this dichotomy.I was born half of a pair of twins, and my other half, my sister, died during childbirth. My head was partially crushed, and had to be "molded" by the delivery doctor during and right after my birth. I've suffered headaches and mood swings all my life, and I can actually feel the bumps on my head where the skull had rippled. I could have died, but I lived, and as a result of this life, which has been loving, creative, and ebullient, I have had some problems. I think this illustrates very well, right from my own beginning, this dichotomy of life.
During childhood, I was deemed fairly intelligent, and my IQ is rather high. But my physical body was never as developed as those of some of the other kids, and I took my share of licks from the bullies. One of my very best friends was one of the most physically endowed boys on campus, however, so I had a buddy to help keep me from being the target of some of the nastier boys in school. I was granted brains but not brawn. A dichotomy during childhood.
The year 1974 would have been my graduation year from college, but instead it was the year I dropped out. Following the traumas associated with my father's death, at 54, of his 13th heart attack, surely not a very lucky number for him, I just couldn't concentrate on studies and schooling, and had to become the family patriarch, and care for my mother, who was hospitalized as a result of her bilateral stroke and the dialysis she had to go through when her kidneys failed. As it happens, "as one door closes, another opens", and my career in retail management took a turn for the better. I was granted opportunity in the face of disappointment. Happiness on the one hand, and tragedy on the other.
I've fallen in love many times, and have been rebuffed, and I have rebuffed those who have fallen in love with me. I have felt such great absence of purpose that I have contemplated suicide a number of times. I know depression, and the pain of lonliness. But I have been granted the gift of perception and am able to write my feelings and observations quite well. I have been writing poetry since the age of 14, and a lot of people have told me that reading my poetry has helped them sort through their own demons. My sadness has stifled the sadness of others. I am grateful that the dichotomy of life has provided me with tools for helping both myself and others in this way. My schooling in college might have ended, and my chosen career in education never happened, but my words have served as a "teacher" for a lot of people who have felt the same way I have, and have acted perhaps differently because of something they read that I wrote.
My own limbs have turned against me. I have lived with a prosthetic hip for over ten years. The hip replacement stopped a lot of pain I suffered through for many years, but now ten years later, I feel a lot of pain again. However the pleasure I feel when the pain goes away almost makes up for the pain that is suffered. Another illustration of this dichotomy. I think the human spirit can survive anything given the chance, and with hope.
I have a great deal of credit card debt, and trying to maneuver through this mountain of debt causes some consternation, but when I realize that the "toys" I have around me, my sports car, bigscreen TVs, computers, and movie collection, are things which help me to enjoy my free time and never get bored, then I know that the one cancels the other, and I really can't complain.
No amount of depression can stop the glee and bliss I know life offers as well. No pending doom or news of strife and sadness can quell my ecstasy and boisterous happiness at the knowledge that I am here, now, able to impact others, and able to care for myself. Since my roommate was diagnosed with cancer, I have chosen to concentrate on the things I like about him, rather than the hundreds of little things I don't like, because in a few years all of these trifles might only be memories, and I would much rather concentrate on the positve memories than the negative.
I hardly remember my parents, or any suffering I survived during my youth and early adulthood. The memories I choose to harbor are the good ones. I can summon my mother's smile. My father's laugh. My siblings are forever together in agreement in my memories, and never quarrelling against each other or me. Life's detours and hazards are few compared with the clear skies of circumstance and the soft wind of love's perception.
Life is strange. We are all in it together. If I can reach out and touch another life with mine, then I have a purpose on the planet, and I will persevere and eventually find the true happiness and bliss that has been afforded me. I want to "touch humanity's face" and I want to feel the touch of humanity returned. I want to shake the hand of hallelujah, and stomp the suffering ashes of inconsistency into the ground with my heels.
Life is strange. But life is good.
Life is a dichotomy, and how we deal with this is how we survive.Other discussions by Internet Islanders concerning the dichotomy of life can be found on Internet Island Topic Post 6.00
Comments (157)
You ARE aware that "Jehovah" is a Germanic mistranslation of the tetragramatton[sp?] don't you
MY father was wiped out on his first heart attack
:wave:Hey there!!! Well, regarding your comment on mine...yes I do wish for menapause for several reasons that I just choose not to discuss with mixed company...lol....anyways, I have not been internetting alot either, I know I need to especially if I want people to come to my site more!!!
Yes, mainly women are the only ones that come to my site...i haven't seen too many guiys on here as I am sure there is, I just do not go to guy sites much...lol...
Well, I hope this finds you in great health and having a wonderful week so far!!
By the way, I was going to ask you...Do you live on an Island? Or are you inland? Just curious....
:sunny:Have a great day!!!!:sunny:
That was a fascinating read.
Dear Mike,
Thanks for your comment. Yes, I am feeling a lot better; my rib is still killing me, but I think I'm healing well from the pneumonia:). That is how I broke my rib, btw--simply from coughing so hard. It kind of makes me wonder about my bone density/strength......
This is a great post that you've written. So early in the A.M. when you posted, too. Are you that deep so early in the a.m. as a norm? Or do you write earlier and revise?
Yes, your words most certainly do manage to "touch" people, and you do have the ability to write your thoughts/feelings extremely well! I really enjoyed your post and look forward to reading more.:sunny:
I just subbed you; I see that you write the actual blogring topics here at your site and want to be able to see and know about them when they are posed.
hey mike, how are you? i enjoyed reading this entry. i'm happy life has given you those tools. many creative ppl have experienced pain in their lives. do you ever regret dropping out of school? i think life teaches us more than school sometimes. i'm real sorry to hear about your hip. i like what you wrote about choosing to remember the good things. i'm real grateful for internet island and i know others are too. you're doing a great job. take care, charlie :sunny:
ps. i think this is a difficult topic to write about for many ppl, that's why there aren't many posts yet.
HI MIke!
My entry is here-
Copy and paste in browser-
http://www.xanga.com/mksmusings
You always tell so much! The way you bare your soul with pride and vigor is part of what endears us to you. How can you not feel connected to somebody who butts in like a brother or an uncle
kisstherail is right. While I feel that most of what I write has the heart of dichotomy in it, I'm still a bit apprehensive and trying to create something that approximates everything I feel and think about the subject. You demand and evoke a lot, Mr. Mike. Smiles and hugs!
I admire how you bare your soul in your writing & for sharing your thoughts on this topic.
:wave: Hiya There Mike!!!
:sunny: Very nice to meet you. Thanks so much for stopping by. I was glad to read from you. I did do one of the Internet Island topics but I can't remember what one it was though. Aghh memory...really is terrible hehe. I enjoy ur blogring very much. I like to visit other ppl's sites & see what they write. I definitely love to make new friends too. I did subscribe to ya. =) & I'll definitely do the latest topic. I'll probably have to do it tonight though & when I do, I'll come back to let ya know hehe.
Awww I don't blame ya not watching the superbowl when u could spend the day with ur girlfriend & I think that is very sweet. What movie did u 2 end up seeing? I am sure u 2 enjoyed the time together. Ohh when u get the chance, u definitely have to watch the movie "The 40 Year Old Virgin" U will like it a lot & laugh ur butt off hehe becuase I know I sure did.
I loved reading ur post, It was definitely fascinating. Do u regret dropping out of school? I wish I went to college but with no money...I guess no college. I would still love to go.. or at least find something where I can do it at home because of my disability. Well I better go. Please come again. Anytime...Take care & Hope u have a blessed week. Hugs....Amanda
our lives are have very different scenes and yet somehow we get to experience similar feelings. i like that your desire is to "touch humanity's face". Duality is there and how we deal with it colours who we are. Thank you for sharing the dualities that have coloured who you are. -g
a video posted
so i thought of you
and you remind me of a guy from work
Mike
I was very touched by this posting. As always you are a great writer. I think that in all of your writing, or at least what I have read, I learned more about you in this one than in any previous. You hit it right on with this topic. We all must have both good and bad in our lives. Some of us have really bad but I almost think that we also have the really good. I think that I would rather suffer through the truly bad to know the the truly good. A life of mediocrity would be so boring. I hope that your hip is not hurting you and that you do reach that enlightened status you seem so close to. Perhaps you can advise the rest of us.
Hugs
Kat
Hiya Mike!!! I wanted to let ya know I posted, here is my entry
Oops here it is hehe http://www.xanga.com/angelheart82/439584892/item.html
Might have to copy & paste
Dichotomy is something I may tackle....my last post might even fit...
This was very interesting and touching to read.
That was so honest adn heartfelt.I really enjoyed that.Thank you.
Dear Mike,
I have not done my dichotomy of life yet but am actually experiencing a lot of the other end of the dichotomy, that being - happiness or I would like to call it joy... I will be able to do this one of these days...
Yours was fun to read and very enlightening...I've known more of you. God bless and keep teh island floating
Have a wonderful day!
Interesting post.......you had a twin sister. wow. that's just amazing.
I re-did my protected list around the first of the year, but if you didn't see the post, you wouldn't have known.
I'm really psyco-paranoid sometimes......I don't keep posts up for very long anyway.
But I've added you. I had a hysterectomy. Full incision. I'm home now. Recovering but still pretty painful.
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