February 1, 2005

• ElectricPoetry Post: 1978 and a New Poem

  

  Here are some more of The Cathy Poems, which are a series of sixty poems written in the year 1978 for Cathy Davidson. As longtime readers of this blog might remember,  I tried to win her love for a nearly a year. Beginning in April, and commencing until December of 1978, I composed sixty poems, almost in a row, and gave Cathy copies as I wrote them. When the "courtship" ended without her reciprocation, I presented her with a small hardbound book with the complete hand written series in order. This is the third  Xanga blog entry containing these "Cathy Poems" Other entries can be read on the December 13th and November 9th entries of WhenWordsCollide. The complete series of poems already transcribed is available on the 1978 page of ElectricPoetry

   

  "Thank You for You" (a Cathy poem)
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  © April 2nd, 1978 6:00 p.m

  
  Tarnished memories have stirred my soul
  When present times feel bad.
  I've never felt so much so whole
  As when remem'bring
          life as a lad

  So I've been beset by broken luck,
  And beginning to feel sad
  I'll go back to rut in which I'm stuck
  And think of all the
          good times I've had.

  Yet now life smiles upon your face
  And shows me your smile is real
  I look in your eyes & my problems erase
  Could this be emotion I feel?

  I just want to say
      Since I met you that day
          I felt you were special
              And really sincere.
  Thank you for you
      And I'll tell you it's true
          That whatever you say
              I will listen and care.

   

  
  "Another Morning Again" (a Cathy poem)
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  © April 25th, 1978

  
  And again and again
  blew 80 bucks over my day off
  had a lot of fun
      just trying to forget the vacancy left by you
  and tonight
  when
  maybe I could say hello
  you'll not be there
  and I'll miss you

  It's hilariously funny
  I know
  I only see you at work
  And you're bored at work
  I wish I could spend
  All of our eternities together
  But that's (as usual) asking too much

  I wish for just another moment
  with you
  You inspire me (that's not just an idle compliment),
  You fill my meager existence with meaning.
  You listen to what I say

  And I haven't said it all yet.

  Clock in clock out go home
  You forget me as soon as I'm gone
  I'll remember you forever.
  I love you.

  
  "Open the Drawer"  (a Cathy poem)
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  Written on my birthday, © May 1, 1978

  
  She shyly rolled her eyes
  And never looked exactly, into mine.
  "Let's be just friends" she'd say.
  And it would always be that way.

  Then there was another
  Knew her for about a week
  The poems cascaded out of me
  As leaves to the bottom of a mug of tea.

  The metaphor for love was never truth
  It sneaked right in to steal my soul
  My dreams disappeared into the dark
  Cupid's arrow was always missing its mark.

  I see a gentle meadow
  Feel a lover's mellow kiss
  Sit beside me on the grass
  The visage all a wish

  Now
  A wistful smile giving herself away
  Manipulating my free desires
  I told you that I loved you
  But you read that word
  In a million other poems
  And can't make up your mind
  till you unterstand its meaning

  Believe me when I tell you
  The word itself is ridiculous
  The metaphor for love is emotion
  Tears fighting their way into
  Everyday conversation
  For no other reason
  Than that you'll never be mine.

  And I find I want to be possessive
  Because I've said all that I've said
  And I find that I'm jealous
  If you give your time to others
  What gives me this right?
  What gives me this inclination.
  I'm supposed to be on the sidelines
  Rooting for your team

  Hooray!
  Hooray!
  Who will win?
  What will be the score?
  Who will suffer the injuries?

  Now I'm fighting too hard to possess you
  Maybe the end is near.
  When you tell me you don't care
  And it's getting to be ridiculous
  Then I can write a
  Last love song
  for you
  As I cry

  Again.

  ---

  I also wrote a new poem this morning so will take the opportunity to post it on this entry. MFN

  "Wholly Rolling Emotion"
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  © February 1, 2005 4:41 a.m. pst

  Holes in my socks this morning
  Seems like holes in my socks every morn
  Searching through drawers
  For a reason
  But each pair, it seems
  Seems to be torn

  Don't know why I put holey socks back
  Seems like all drawers are full as can be
  With gaping holey socks
  Which just can't be darned
  And the darn things
  Just overwhelm me

  The answer of course is to buy more
  But in future more holes will appear
  For some reason I don't
  Toss out old pairs
  Holey socks here
  On my feet I wear

  Holes in my heart this morning
  Seems like holes in my heart every morn
  Searching through memories
  For a reason
  But the holes, it seems
  Leaves me forlorn

  Don't know why holes in my heart attack
  Seems like each past love rends with despair
  With gaping holes bleeding love
  In a broken, fragile heart
  This just doesn't
  seem to be fair

  Holes in my socks
  Holes in my heart
  Feeble rotten luck
  Will love for me 'ere start?

   

  • 8:20 am
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