May 24, 2013

  • Memorial Poetry: His Smile

    "His Smile"
    Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
    May 22, 2013 9:15a.m. pdt

     

    I met him soon after he passed an age I recently passed
    I was much younger,
    and felt his wisdom shine
    through his smile.
    He was smiling that knowing, all encompassing smile
    A smile which told me he'd had a grand life
    He'd enjoyed great joys
    (if perhaps he suffered great traumas and loss,
    nobody could know,
    because his smile overcame all obstacles.)
    I will never forget his smile.

    Soon after we met, I lost a livelihood
    He offered me another, and became not only employer,
    But mentor, teacher, and friend.

    He became surrogate father to my fatherless existence.
    He could pave the way with reason,
    and he could light the world with his smile
    (Oftentimes burying my own depressions with his mirth)

    He was a massive man, towering over most he encountered
    He was a titan in the industry he represented
    known and loved by all
    Watching him in action was a joy to behold
    His encouragement and joie de vivre overflowing
    As I age, I hope to be as vibrant as he remained
    even as the decades between us advanced.

    He never grew old, only accumulated more experience
    Smiling through everything
    and though personal strife could rip one in his orbit nearly in twain
    his smile wouldn't allow that to happen
    and it never did when he was present.

    He was present in my life, during almost half of it
    and now he's gone.

    I shall grieve his loss and I shall celebrate his influence
    (and of course his smile)

    What does one say about the loss of a life,
    The loss of a man, and his thoughts, and his worth?
    What meaning can mere words relate of ninety full years,
    The culmination of a grand wonderful existence bursting forth?

    The moment passes after the shock subsides
    And it never really subsides, knowing even the moment
    will become as months and years until we too, pass
    from this mortal plane

    The tears fall silently, or perhaps in a raging torrent
    As the shock settles, and the moment lasts seeming forever.

    The longer one lives, the more lives seem to lose their footing,
    Other lives, other realities, other universes of circumstance.
    One believes one is inured to death and dying after some time
    And questioning "who died" becomes just another greeting
    after a while

    but this isn't true
    Because the shock and the moment, the grief, the tears
    Are always waiting around the next corner,
    accompanied by the Reaper, grim as ever,
    as he cuts down another life,
    relaying another shock.

    A friend passed into the universal consciousness this morning.

    A father figure, a mentor, a hearty, hale, and jolly fellow has died.
    The grand figurehead of a large and loving family
    Always noticed immediately in family photos,
    always smiling
    always ready with a hearty laugh.

    The head of the family has been cut, after almost half a decade
    of suffering and pain, caused when a stroke hampered him greatly
    but never seemed to tarnish the eternal sheen of his sweet smile

    He smiled through his incapacitance
    He smiled through the trips to the doctor, the hospital stays
    The relegation of his once vibrant and creative mind to the
    shadows
    He suffered greatly in the end, but the suffering
    never seemed to appear through the smile
    and now the suffering has ceased.

    I will remember the extended dialogues,
    the grace always given me,
    His repeated pleas "Don't go yet" when
    an attempt was made to leave his office.

    I want to scream "Don't go yet" but it was time
    In time we all have the need to go
    It doesn't stop the grief, it doesn't stop our tears
    He has faded from his earthly stay
    leaving a large and loving family
    both familial and familiar
    leaving a world a bit more lonely without him
    and
    leaving,
    Chesire catlike, a smile
    which shall never fade from memory


    BEHIND THE POETRY: Jack, the President and CEO of the company for which I work, passed away this morning. We were all called into the conference room, which we still call "his office" even though he has been absent from "his office" since he was felled by a stroke about four years ago. It's almost lunch time now, and I began writing this poem on and off at 9:30am as soon as I left the conference room. Here is a photo of Jack and me at the 2010 company Christmas party.

    EDIT 5/24/13 noon: Thank you everyone for the wonderful and consoling comments. As many of my regular readers know, I don't blog about work. However I have mentioned Jack in some of my "reminiscence" essays. F'rinstance: During the time I estranged myself from my ex girlfriend Pat after we broke up, but before the lease on our house expired, I had no transportation, but spent weekends back at my old digs in "the Frat house" with my (late) friends Bob and Joel. On Friday afternoons after work, I'd "carpool" to "the Frat house" with Jack and he'd pick me up on Monday mornings to take me to work. Jack's family have all read my poem and have thanked me for the sentiment. We are having the memorial at Jack's church on Memorial Day, no less. (He's a veteran of WWII) After that we're going to the family home for a "party". Our 4th of July work parties are legendary, and instead of mourning, we'll celebrate the life of this fantastic man in the manner he would most enjoy. We'll all pledge allegiance, like during the 4th of July parties, and I'm sure we'll hear Jack's booming voice joining us from the heavens. MFN/ppf

    Posted: May 22, 2013 12:06 PM

Comments (202)

  • Who can come into our lives and change it for the better?
    Looks like your better life is owed to this man.

    How do we repay kindness and compassion?
    Compassion comes like falling rain for the plants.
    Kindness is something that we are never sure of until
    the results become evident.

    So where to go, where are we going?
    I am going to try hard to be like Jack.
    I need no more role models but need to work on the good
    that wise people know helps make the world turn.

  • What a beautiful tribute to Jack! He did have a wonderful smile! Thank you for sharing him with us, Mike! I'm so sorry for your great loss...but I'm so glad he was a part of your life! I will pray for comfort for you, his family, and all those who knew him. It would be great if you could share this poem with his family or at his funeral.
    HUGS!!!

  • What a beautiful tribute. <3

  • I am sorry you lost your wonderful friend...God Bless you....this is a beautiful poem thank you for sharing

  • I'm sorry for your loss.  I'm sure he will appreciate what you wrote. 

  • His repeated pleas "Don't go yet" when
    an attempt was made to leave his office. I want to scream "Don't go yet" but it was time
    In time we all have the need to go~ such a powerful statement.

    Much love and comfort to you, Mike, as you let go of your surrogate father.

  • I am sorry to read that you have experienced the loss of someone who obviously meant so much to you. I agree with you about his smile. The poem is a brilliant and loving tribute to Jack. You have been blessed by having this man in your life through your job. I'll be praying for comfort and peace for you, your co-workers, and Jack's family and friends in your grief.  ~~Blessings 'n Cheers

  • Wonderful, heart-felt tribute! So hard to do so soon after his passing...I know something about that,

  • Thanks, Mike, for the update. I love that Jack's celebration of life will be on Memorial Day!
    HUGS!

  • Great poem and a nice tribute. 

  • Sorry to hear about Jack. May his soul rest in peace. 

  • Dear Mike.

    It seems Xanga is likely to close its doors and switch off the lights. I always regarded you as one of true Xangans and your blog is probably the only one that was their constantly through my journey with Xanga. Should Xanga close down, I want to give you a special thanks for your blogging. Some of your poetry made me sad, some of your humor made me laugh and your photo's sometimes made me wish to see life through your eyes. We will probably not meet again. I wish you well on your journey and life path. On some level I always resonated well with your philosophy and approach to life. make every moment count. I say good bye to you as a friend and a true Xangan

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