November 27, 2009
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Books of the Realizations 2: Wisdom and Questioning
THE BOOKS OF THE REALIZATIONS: A series of philosophical/spiritual essays
Today's blog entry comprises the SECOND BOOK of THE REALIZATIONS. These five chapters were written in 1999 as a preface to what eventually became "The Universal Blog". , a website where I post my spiritual entries. The Books of the Realizations tell the story of my own "personal" journey toward enlightenment. For those of you who might stumble across this entry and are interested in perusing the complete text of Five Books or Chapters right now, the complete Books of the Realizations are on the web HERE. I am interspersing these five chapters among my entries on WhenWordsCollide over the next few weeks. Chapter Two, or The Second Book follows. MFN (originally posted 3/16/05)The Realizations
the true story of faith and how it can be obtained.
by Michael F. NyiriTHE BOOK OF THE FIRST REALIZATON
THE BOOK OF THE SECOND REALIZATION:
Wisdom and Questioning
The second realization in my life arrived after a particularly satisfying trip to New England with a friend and his family for a vacation. Like a mad journalist I respected and copied, we filled a rented car with drugs and alcohol and drove from California to New Jersey with his wife, mother, and two children. The car broke down. The children were impossible, but we were higher than kites for most of the trip, and I remember it as a truly exciting experience. When I returned to my job as department manager, I was demoted from Garden manager to Seasonal manager, and then I was hit with the second realization. I was fired, ostensibly for dress code violations, in reality for drug abuse off the job, but after nearly six months on unemployment insurance frantically trying to find a new job I realized that again, life is not structured, and certain things seem to happen for no apparent reason.A new job beckoned, for a new retail establishment trying to lay a groundwork in Southern California in the latter part of the seventies. The gentleman who hired me had been a carpet buyer at the retail chain which was swallowed by the new fish, and he had essentially been downsized into being a store manager for the new chain. Since the stores were being remodeled, there was a great feeling of revitalization and rebirth in this particular company, and the gentleman guided me through the machinations of the job as well as the vagaries of his philosophies. At this point, I again began to feel a sense of empowerment, of invulnerability.
My "Godfather", as I called him, had gone through a series of life changes just as recently as I had, the only difference being that he was about twenty years older. He gave me the word: realization. He taught me what he had not learned from his life, and it taught me much.
The lesson is simple, and it has formed the basis of what I believe to be true and fact. The seed which planted for me the secret of the universe. With age comes knowledge. With time comes wisdom. No matter how one perceive's oneself, as an ignoramus or a know-it-all, no one knows anything until it comes to them. In time, almost all manner and matter of life experiences sets one up for realizations. If one keeps passing over these clues to existence, then one cannot be fulfilled by the lessons life has to teach. If one can spot and regulate these clues, then one is on a personal journey toward enlightenment, at least in the corporeal world. My Godfather told me I would see much in time, that I would know things and more. At the time, since these realizations hadn't manifested themselves completely in my psyche, I really didn't know exactly what he was talking about. I felt he was elliptical and senseless. But I listened, and I learned. Age itself is the teacher, and as one passes through this journey called life one is filled with the tools to understand not only the self but the self-in-self, the universal mind which permeates us all. But I am getting ahead of myself.
My second realization was the dictum to watch, live, and learn. All these platitutes passed on for centuries had a little truth in them, and what one had to learn from existence first of all was to sift through and decipher all the experiences and wisdom which have come before and organize them into a tangible plan for living.
My eyes had been opened. But a couple of realizations at such a young age of course did not spell truth for me yet. My Godfather had problems himself, and I didn't really think he had much to give to me in the way of knowledge at the time. He drank heavily, as I was doing also, and when he was kicked out of his house by his wife he spent the first night on my couch in my living room. Eventually the company needed my skills as a truck driver (My Godfather had "taught" me how to drive a multiple speed transmission by putting me in the cab of a company truck and telling me to step on the gas. I essentially taught myself, and this knowledge came to good use.)
Driving a truck full of merchandise around the whole of Southern California, I lost track of my Godfather. The eighties were dawning, and I felt a surge of rebirth. I ceased questioning life, and began living. I still manipulated a sort of double life, and new and more intriguing drugs were added to the mix. I do not discount these experiences with drugs and alcohol. Many souls feel lost because they cannot control their basest desires. I used mind expanding substances first as simply a means of entertainment, but certain chemicals when mixed with those in the brain cause an immersive experience which just cannot be discounted. Again, a realization was about to emerge. A realization which has been around at least since the early indigenous peoples started ingesting certain herbs and roots which transported them to another plane of existence.
By this time I felt no spiritual guidance at all. I had truly "left the church" of Western Civilization. It would be years before I realized the connection between the rise of Western Civilization, and Christianity in particular, with the rise of ill will between the peoples of the world, but that is getting ahead of myself again. The third realization began as entertainment, something to do on a Friday night, partying with friends. My buddy with whom I traveled to New Jersey in 1977 had kept urging me to try acid, lysergic acid diethemilyde, or LSD for about a year. I took my first "trip" that year and after numerous "trips" another realization came to me. One which caused me to question the complete audacity of the teachings of modern civilization and religious beliefs. The drugs weren't an end-all and be-all. Like all life experience, they were teaching tools, and they taught me much.
Also in the early eighties, after much searching for a soul mate, I began a series of short but intense physical and intellectual relationships with women. I couldn't find the soul mate, but I did find a woman who introduced me to some of the more demanding personal growth programs which permeated much of the seventies. She was an EST graduate, and her husband was an acolyte of the Lifespring group. Although no one hears much about these programs anymore. It seems most of the programs advertised nowadays are set up to make you believe you can make more money, at that time many people became "me groupies" enthralled with the idea that they could better their world by bettering themselves. Of course the people who ran these programs elicited much money from the acolytes, and thought they could improve people's worth by belittling them. The point is that people are looking for answers, and though I felt I found no answers within these groups they did answer a need. And that need is still here. In fact, at this turn of the Millennium there is more need for answers than ever before, but the answers do not lie in the betterment of self, but in the betterment of understanding of a new type of belief system, one which deletes the need of self-fulfillment, because it is self-fulfilling in it's simplicity.
At the dawn of the eighties, I was hit with the third realization
To Be Continued Soon, or click here for the rest of the story.
From the Philosophy Section of AllThingsMike in 1999: For years I have held to a belief system which incorporates lessons from life which I have learned. I call these lessons realizations. They lead to the final realization, from which humankind will embrace the Universal Mind. These beliefs are not new, and are not mine. They are realizations which affect everybody. With the Millennium upon us, I feel compelled to write down the history and origins of these realizations. This is a work in progress.The Personal Journey to the Realizations is over for the writer in the book of the Fifth Realization.
From the beginning part of the foundation for AllThingsMike consisted of a philosophical discussion of existence and the existence of the Universal Mind, which supplants and replaces all religion and philosophical thought which has gone before. MFN 1999
Comments (109)
you have such a life. you've done so much. it's so cool. you must share some throwback pictures..! :]
i kind of want to hear more about that lady you last pursued.
it takes me a couple days to read your blogs sometimes but I have concluded at least one thing
you never sleep either
What an amazing journey so far in these two parts; I must go find the rest of it.
Interesting, Mike.
My two cents:
I like the realization about "self" toward the end. The more one focuses on "self," the more spiritually "lost" one becomes. The road to spiritual maturity requires getting away from self and finding fulfillment in serving and helping others. Jesus said, (I'm paraphrasing)...."any of you who would seek to be great must first become servant of all." The apostle Paul said, "He who humbles himself will be exalted."
That's my personal angle on the matter. I like your post.
Hi Mike, I recommended this entry because this is the type of blog entry that I personally enjoy and admire the most. I love the way you took learning from your life experiences. I wish I could read more of these type of entries on Xanga. You are a bit vague about the lessons you learned from your drug usage. I dont know if you are coming back to it because I have not yet followed the link to the rest of the story...(which I will do after this comment). If you don't then I would urge you to do it. I think we seldom get a view from people who were into drugs in that specific time period. As usual your way of writing your story was interesting and an enjoyable read.
So true it is not th ebetterment of self, but the understanding of a new belief system, a new agenda and motives for our daily actions on this path called life. Interesting reading today Michael. Well put.
You've been nostalgic for a while now
Well, I know one thing for sure, you've had a life that was full of energy, trials and more, but one thing, despite it being messed up at times, I know you could never regret it. I love how colorful and full of zest you were back then (kinda wishing I was born earlier, lol) but I have to admit that I love the guy you are now
And as for your Xangpedias, I think that was the first time I ever posted on your blog
I don't regret this 1.5 year friendship we have, and I hope it thrives.
Take care, dearest, and thanks for keeping faith in me
I love reading about your journey! I'm glad to read the 2nd part! I will wait to read the rest when you post it soon! I like learning from other people's lives. Must be why I read a lot of biographies!!!
Hugs!
@flatpick46 - I need to say that I totally agree with your "two cents"! I've learned this in my life. I try to live of life of service...I do a ton of volunteer work...I am always helping friends and others. But it's difficult....because as the Bible describes...I have such a selfish, wicked heart. That's why I needed a savior.
Hugs to you! 
@carolinaatnight - Hugs right back atcha!! ThankGod we DO have a Savior!
That was a interesting post. I loved reading about your life. I too, would like to read about the use of drugs and the realization you had with that.
The cartoon of the yellow submarine must have been inspired by 'shrooms. It is not for the fainthearted or people who don't have a strong mind to survive.
EGads Hallmark store has quite a few Betty Boop stuff but they are way more expensive than an ordinary collector would want.
Be very glad you don't experiment with drugs in your 50's. It was a young man's game. Then again Timothy leary did survive it, I wonder at what age?
:wave: Hello Mike! I am trying to get caught up with subs reading after returning from Austin yesterday. I appreciate your visit and your Thanksgiving wishes. It sounds as though you had a feast yourself, and good for you.
~~Blessings, prayers 'n cheers
@flatpick46 - Amen. Randy! We find self by losing self in service to others. And that is "most certainly true".
Thanks. I just got back from five days in Tennessee for Thanksgiving so I'm trying to catch up. I'll try to return later to give it the reading it deserves.
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