July 10, 2008

• ElectricPoetry Post: Two New Poems for July

   “Bloggerel”
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  July 10, 2008 4:08 a.m. pdt

  First conversation
  Words, explanations, understandings, conflicts
  Language
  Next writing
  Cursive, cuneform, print, correspondence
  Telephony
  Substations, party lines, area codes
  Then computers
  Email, websites, search engines
  And blogs
  Self publishing, art distribution, criticism, comedy,
  Recognition, comments, readership
  Computer conversation
  15 minutes of internet fame for some
  Mammoth databases containing unread masterpieces
  for others
  Blogosphere
  Millions of netizens
  Daily questions and answers
  Checking comments
  Espousing wisdom and banality
  Sometimes at the same time
  Bloggerel

  
  “The Cancerboy Diaries: Entry the Ninth”
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  July 10, 2008 4:17 a.m. pdt

  The first years were the best
  The hair didn’t fall out
  Nauseating nihilism kept it’s distance
  Nobody really could tell you were sick
  I begged you then to come with me
  On trips, to breakfast, somewhere
  anywhere
  The first few chemotherapies seemed okay
  No problems that you couldn’t solve
  I kept asking you to accompany me
  to concerts, walking tours, hikes
  And you kept interest
  until the last minute
  as usual
  The last minute finally arrived
  This year has been the worst
  And doubtless the next few years
  how ever many there are to be
  will be worse and worse
  and only memory will serve to show that
  the first years were the best

  Now
  You’re wasting away
  Only 130 pounds
  Can’t eat, can’t sleep
  Sometimes you can’t even keep your pills down
  Fifth chemotherapy was
  temporarily cancelled
  because of the pain
  The whites of the eyes become yellow!
  The bile piled up
  and couldn’t secrete
  so a trip to Emergency for tests
  showed a blockage
  hopefully non cancerous
  but at this point it might even be moot

  A stent alleviates the blockage
  A respite from impending death
  For the time being at least

  A bowl by your side to
  catch the cancerous spittle
  as your stomach wars with you
  You have to ask for trips
  to the bank or the pharmacy
  because you can hardly walk anymore

  The first years were the best
  I hope you cherish those early years
  before the emaciation advanced so badly
  that it pains me to look at you now.

  We’re planning for the eventuality now
  At last
  As this year, the worst, passes into history
  A pained history for the books
  A partial history of soul wrenching agony
  You are finalizing your estate
  for your heirs
  You are aware that
  the best years have passed
  and the worst is yet to come
  but it’s pretty bad now
  I will help you as much as I can
  During this most difficult time in your short life
  As long as it lasts.

  ---

  NEWS AND NOTES: It’s been a while, even for me, since I last posted to the blog. I haven’t been visiting so am not expecting comments or interaction. I have written a couple of new poems, so I am presenting them here as usual. A few things are keeping me busy and off my home computer for a bit. 1.It’s been very busy at work. I’m always topping myself, even after 20 years on the job. In only five workdays, I’ve sent out 22 individual quotes. I also have tested quite a few panels and am keeping up with the design work. Because of all the recent activity, I am not blogging at work at all. When I come home, I’m pretty tired and usually watch a movie or two before bed. 2. My roommate Joel (Cancerboy) had to go to Emergency last week when he became jaundiced. He spent the 4th of July holiday weekend in the hospital. He came home on Monday. He had a stent (valve) put in his liver so that the bile can secrete. The poor guy is not doing okay at all. We thought the end was near for a bit there. 3. I’m awaiting word about the next step before my hip replacement replacement surgery is scheduled. 4. I’m not feeling too creative. Since my blog is where I “store” my “art and literature”, and I’m not creating any, I really don’t feel like blogging, either posting or visiting. 5. I installed a new 1 terabyte hard drive on my computer, and now I’m having problems with my sound card. Whenever I have problems with the puter, I don’t spend too much time on it till I can find a way to fix the problem. These things go in cycles, I’m not really “on hiatus” but I’m not really active either. Last entry I posted the Blogged.com link to see if anyone was interested in “writing a review” of my blog. Two of my readers complied, and I wish to give thanks to Maha (QweenCat ) and Lisa  ( Ladyblue1 ) for your excellent ratings  and reviews, but most of all for participating.  MFN/ppf

  • 7:41 am
  • 18 Comments