August 6, 2007

• The Book of Love: A WayBack Post

  

  

  The Book of Love
  

  an essay by Michael F. Nyiri

  Originally posted on October 27th, 2005 I found this entry I originally posted for the Socrates Cafe blogring in a notepad file on my computer, and am reposting it because I thought it was a pretty good essay. I haven't updated since last Thursday, and didn't spend any time on the computer at all over the weekend. I'm planning to write some more, including finally finishing the series "My Life With Pat", but I'm still in the "reminiscing" process and not ready to write yet. So for lack of new material, and to keep the blog updated, here is "The Book of Love".

  Love is the diaphanous thread that connects each of our souls to the Universal Mind. It is a fickle and misunderstood concept, maligned and embraced, pondered perhaps too much, and yet dismissed sometimes before it's time arrives fully in bloom.
  There are myriad "types" of emotions that we humans identify as "love", some "true", some "false" and some "mystical" but all tend, in the end analysis, to serve as our connection to each other on some ethereal plane that is almost unknowable or undefinable while we experience it, yet each one of us knows instinctively when we "feel" it.
  Immediately upon hearing about "love", we either think first about inter-relational love, between two people, familial love, between two members of the same family, or all-encompassing love, between one soul and humanity. We can also love a 'thing' or an experience, so "love" becomes an active verb for some relating to a positive feeling received during good times and favored activities.
  All major religions preach "love" even as they attempt to deny and destroy their enemies. In fact, most religions and philosophical processes embrace the idea of love for one's neighbor and enemy. Love is trumpeted as a cure all to many societal ills. "All you need is love." "Love your enemies as you would yourself."
  Yet for all mankind's attempted embrace of the concept, throughout history, love takes a backseat to her sister hate, perhaps another side of the coin, so to speak, but perhaps just another strong emotional reaction to this slender thread of circumstance that essentially connects each and every one of us.
  A "common man" will respond to idea of love with affection and care. A dictionary definition of the term will state that love is a "strong and deep feeling of affection." First one has affection for someone or thing, and the next step would be "love" or a "deep affection." I believe love is more than "just an affection" no matter how strong. This is what makes love a fickle concept. Love, like beauty, art, and intelligence, exists. It is ingrained in all of us. The degrees to which we claim to "feel" it or "experience" it's "charms" is what makes us "human" in our corporeal existence. One more sliver of humanity that defines us.
  When a mother gives birth, she "loves" her child. That some mothers can suffer post partum depression and even attempt to snuff the child's life illustrates for us that this "flip side" of the "coin" of love and hate can seem tenuous at best. A man can love a woman with "all his heart" but he can become enraged with jealousy and attempt to hurt and maim that love of his, in the person of his woman, if he believes she is "cheating" on him. Familial love is fraught with instances of disownings and denials of the emotion, when two members of the family disagree strongly. For every postitve idea of love, there is an equal and opposite negative, or "hate" reaction. Any "Book" of "Love" has to understand that the "Physics" of love are undeniably linked, and we probably couldn't "define" love without a "definition" of it's opposite emotion "hate".
  Is it "hate" that causes fights and bickering, and eventual harm among "lovers"? Or is this love emotion so intertwined, as the oriental idea of yin and yang, with it's sister hate, that it inspires this opposite reaction in almost all cases, in almost all kinds of people, throughout history?
  Perhaps. Because "love" is our inner string of connection with humanity, combining and separating us, all of our foibles and fallacies concerning the emotion are just as strong and deeply felt. Yes, I believe we can love and hate at the same time. Bleeding the hate, while retaining the love, should be our quest while we exist in this plane.
  In the Universal, attained by our  "souls" after our death, all "hate" and "love", just as "past" and "future", combine and coalesce, and in our "final realization" we finally understand why the dichotomies of corporeal existence are almost given to us, like the gift of a mammoth puzzle, while we walk the Earth.
  As one attains enlightenment, one understands the connection of "love" and is able to "love" his neighbor and his enemy with as much brio as he loves his family and his paramours. This "thread" is a flimsy one, and is apt to break, and does with ease. But with time and understanding it can also mend as if it were never broken.
  If each soul looks deep into himself, then he will understand that love lies deep within. Love permits each one of us to appreciate our existence, and to interconnect with our fellow man. If we bleed hate from the love experience, our love is infinitely more "pure" and overcoming. We should be able to respond in kind to the sight of newborn child, seemingly innocent of all societal fearmongering and prejudice, whether that child is our own, our neighbor's, or our enemy's. He is the same child, filled with love and deep affection, until he is "taught" the dichotomies of existence by his society.
  Deep within us lies our connection with each other. That connection is best defined by the simple word: "LOVE."

  ---

  I wrote a poem in 1973, when I was 20 years old, in response to a popular single pane newspaper cartoon of the time entitled "Love is..." Each pane would present some "cutesey" phrase, accompanied by naked cherublike "big eyed" kids. I used to cringe when I saw this cartoon in the newspaper, and my poem was an "answer" to the cartoon series.

  "Love is..."
  Poetry by Michael F.Nyiri
  Jan. 3, 1973

  
  I    Of all the world, or the people in it -
    They said everyone had a mate

  II   The lovebirds sit on their perch
    and sing

  III   What is love? he asked of the woman
    Sixty-five grey hair fur coat
    Love is...found a quote in a newspaper
    What is love? he asked of the girl
    Blonde hair nice figure cheerleader
    Love is...found a quote in a newspaper

  IV   Someone gets famous
    for attempting to define
    That which cannot be defined
    Love is...nothing unless both feel it
    at the same time - radiance seeping
    through to the inner soul - warmth
    telling her that he is there
    forever - and vice versa

    Love is...touch - grasping each other's
    emotions through the facades they put up -
    feeling for imperfections in the
    soul and not caring superficially

    Love is caring, wanting, expressing,
    movement, losses, quarrels, agreements,
    making up - and breaking up

    Love is a paper both parties have
    to sign

  V   Love is young and old and eternal
    The old men say love is blind
    The young women say it is
    Something old something new
    Something borrowed something blue
    Love is relationships - letters in a
    drawer - names carved on a tree -
    sitting together in the rain - smiling

  VI   Love isn't a quote in a newspaper
    Love isn't "cute"
    Love is real and hard and heartbreaking
    Love is lonely and miserable
    Love is waiting for a phone to ring
    for two weeks - waiting for a
    letter to arrive - waiting for a
    kind word - or a premonition
    Love is...unkind sometimes

  VII   Love is...two little children playing in
    the mud
    Love is...the very first kiss
    Love is...sleeping together

    Love is...something that can't be
    described...
    Love is...
    Period

  ---

  The image at the top of this essay is a photocomposite featuring me as the "White Knight" beside my white horse, and is the lead image on my "Lovesearch" website on AllThingsMike. Please visit the "Lovesearch" to read about my "Search for Love" on the internet during 1999 and 2000.

  • 9:19 am
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