April 20, 2006

  • I'm Naked On Xanga

    naked

    Actually, I've still got my glasses on, so I'm not "totally naked". One Xangan who constantly gets hundreds of comments every single entry once told me that a sure fire way to make "featured content", or to have my post "featured' on the main page of Xanga, which happens when one receives 40 or more eprops in a given time period, was to "post naked" and that was sure to give an entry "feautred content" status. Well, since I have no shame, and since "bravery" is my middle name, I thought I'd illustrate the following "reminiscence" with a photo of what I looked like when I ventured to the "Sun Club" described in the story. I'm a bit older, but I'm still pretty much "in shape", except for the beer gut. If this offends any of my regular readers, please feel free to tell me so. My email address is michaelnyiri@sbcglobal.net in case you are too embarrassed to leave a comment. Always bending the rules, just to see what happens. Possible "flags" will be listed below the article. Enjoy. MFN

    A Weekend With "Bruce the Nudist"

     A "naked reminiscence" by Michael F. Nyiri


    "Nudism is such a worthy cause. We must bring the message to the people. We must teach them to unmask their poor suffocating bodies and let them breathe again. Clothes are the enemy. Without clothes, there would be no sickness, there'd be no war. I ask you sir: Can you imagine two great armies on the battlefield, no uniforms, completely nude? No way of telling friend from foe, all brothers together." Doro Merande as the Health Food Restaurant Waitress to Tom Ewell in "The Seven Year Itch" (1955)

    I like to wear as few clothes as possible. I've always been like this, preferring to walk around my home in the buff when it's hot, (with the curtains drawn, naturally, and when Joel isn't around) and I don't think I've worn "pajamas" to bed since 1969. I don't find anything wrong with the human body, and I rarely get flummoxed over seeing a "bit of skin". I'm a "red blooded" boy when it comes to healthy expressions of nonsexual nudity, and I'm pretty brave. Co-ed bathing at pool parties finds me doffing my shorts with no afterthought. I don't have a particularly "muscular" body, in fact, as I age, the "beer belly" gets bigger and bigger, but I'm just not ashamed of how I look in the buff. I really think nobody should be. We weren't born with  swaddling clothes, after all. We were born in our wrinkly skin. As we age, it gets wrinkly again, but back in 1981 when I met "Bruce the Nudist", I was only in my late 20s, and though I drank lots of it, the beer belly hadn't appeared yet. I still had some of my hair left, and I stayed in shape. Never one to pass up an opportunity of any kind, I struck up a friendship with Bruce, who was the warehouse security guard at FedMart in Long Beach, CA, where I was one of the management staff. Everybody knew Bruce, a youngish 40, with John Lennon specs and a winning smile. Bruce practiced nudity at a "sun club" or nudist camp, during the weekends. Everybody at work, guys and gals, were solicited by Bruce at one time or another for a "weekend at the club". Most people turned him down. I'm not that prudish, however, and when he invited me for a "weekend at the club" I only asked him what time he was going to pick me up.
    Truth be told, during the three days prior to the actual weekend, I did feel a bit strange. What if I "popped a boner" at an inappropriate time? Bruce always liked to say "It's not hard on a nudist". Meaning, a male member of the club should never "come to attention". It was a "hard and fast" rule that erections were frowned upon by the sun loving populace.
    My adventure began inauspiciously. I didn't really pal around with a lot of the guys at work socially, because I was in upper management, and off hours I palled around with Jim, my "godfather" who was the store manager and a friend. I had given Bruce directions to my apartment, and I was able to pack light. Besides the clothes I would wear in the car on the way to the club, I only packed another change of clothes for when I was to return. During the weekend, I wouldn't need anything except my toothbrush. Shoes were worn on rocky trails, etc, but mostly, I would be wearing my birthday suit. Bruce picked my up on Saturday morning for a drive to the San Clemente area, in Orange County, up in the hills above Pacific Coast Highway. He had never been to my place, but he found it quite easily, and before long we were on the road, and I was asking a lot of questions, most of which were answered simply with: "Wait till we get there".
    The Sun Club was "off the beaten track", up in the hills, sort of like a campground. We were to stay in Bruce's girlfriend's trailer. Most of the members of the club had RVs or mobile homes on the grounds. Driving into the camp, we registered, and I paid a small fee as a "first time visitor". One rule for first time visitors was that once inside the camp, we were not allowed to leave until after the weekend was over. One of the main reasons I never joined the club, besides the fact that the membership price was quite prohibitive even back in the early 80s, was that there were lots of "rules and regulations", and I was a bit of a bohemian, even though I was in retail management, back in those days.
    Upon hearing the gates close behind us, and on the way to the large parking lot where most of the trailers were parked, I almost felt as if I were going to prison, for scant moments, until I started to see naked people all over the place.
    There were old men, vivacious women, fifteen year old girls with budding breasts straining to grow larger. There was an old coot who explained the wart on his penis, yanking on it so I could get a better look. Bruce's girlfriend was a stunning knockout, and I struggled "hard" not to get that way when we met, and I shook her hand, as her grandiose melons shook a bit as well.
    There was a "civic center", a pool, onsite living facilities for the founders and "old timers". I enjoyed vigorous games of shuffleboard and volleyball. Yes, there was lots of jiggling in the volleyball game. We had naked cookouts, and campfires. The weekend went relatively quickly. I made a lot of instant friendships, and I asked Bruce somewhat shyly about the sexual aspect of the place. It seems that a lot of "nudists" or "sun worshippers" at least in those days, were swingers as well. At night, "behind the closed doors' of the houses and the trailers, a lot of hanky panky was going on, but since I was a "naked virgin" I wasn't given a peephole into that part of the experience. If I would have paid the membership fee and came back a second time or more, those avenues of pleasure would have "opened up" for me. On Sunday morning, for example, after waking up in a cot in Bruce's girlfriend's trailer, I couldn't help but notice that they were making love.
    That weekend I had lots of fun. This retreat happened during one of our California summers, and the weather was quite nice. After a while, I didn't miss my clothes at all. As I stated earlier, I like walking around naked anyway, so I felt quite at home in the "sun club".
    Nudists like to regale newbies with stories of their open lifestyles, and I got quite an earful. Sometimes I even regret the fact that I couldn't afford the membership fees, which were about a thousand dollars a year or thereabouts, so that I could go back again and again.
    Truly, these folks were free and easy, and their camaraderie and helpfulness was refreshing and "nakedly" honest.
    I only spent that one weekend with Bruce the Nudist, but I treasure the memories of walking around in nature as God intended for us, before the fall from Grace. After the experience, Bruce could get me giggling with just a look or a well suggested double entendre.
    Today, I still like to shed as much clothing as possible, and in the photo above, you see me as God intended, in good humor, and without the restriction of clothing (except for my glasses, and I need them to see, of course)
    I wonder, would anyone agree to go spend a weekend with Bruce the Nudist if he asked you? I did, and I'm glad I did to this day.

    Possible "flags" in this article: Malicious Impersonation: I'm impersonating me, as I have always done. Adult Content: I am adult, and this is content. I don't think the pose is any less "titillating" than a photo of me in a bathing suit or shorts, and for all you know, I am wearing shorts, and airbrushed them out, since I do a lot of photoshopping my images. Underaged Nudity: I'm turning 53 on May 1. I still feel like a kid, but I don't think this qualifies. Advocating Self Harm: If one of our cats were to jump in my lap at an inappropriate time, then I could be scratched pretty badly. Too Much Personal Info: Definitely too much information. But it's in fun, folks! I think that about covers it. Or uncovers it, as the case may be. Now that I'm finished with this post, do I hit "delete" or do I hit "Save Changes." Well, as I said , I'm brave and have no shame, so let's see what kind of comments if any I get with the "Naked on Xanga" post. I will ask my readers, as I have repeatedly with my "Sexual History" posts, that you let me know if you think I should change this entry to "protected status". MFN, out on a limb, without any clothes.


    EDIT: 4/21/06: 2:33 pm pdt: Thanks, Gang. It worked. I'll have to remember next time that the "title" doesn't show up on the FC entry, only the first line of the entry, so the word "naked" is not on the FC page. Oh, well. Live and learn. Good advice from some of you, and I know most of this already. I am attempting to make the posts somewhat shorter, and they are posted every other day or more, to give people the time to catch them. This site will always load slow on older computers, however, thus the disclaimer at the very top of the page. I'm creating art here, and nothing stops (or limits) my muses. MFN

    43. Visit baldmike2004's Xanga Site!

    Actually, I've still got my glasses on, so I'm not "totally...
    Total eProps: 44 | Total Comments: 21
    Posted by baldmike2004 - 4/20/2006 at 8:59 PM

Comments (126)

  • Haha. Brilliance.

    I think I need to take on the flags myself, although I do every day.

  • My hubby and I used to sit around nude all the time before the girls were born :lol:
    Next year Blizzie is going off to college and we will just be the two of us again... hubby is already excited :eek: :rolleyes: :spinning:

  • That was awesome Michael!

  • Way to go Mike! :goodjob: Good-luck on the comments thing... hope you make Featured.

    Actually, it isn't the content of your posts, it's your delivery. You have too much respect for your readers. You work too hard. You need to adopt a bully-boy "I'm cool and everyone else is stupid if they don't agree with me" attitude like they have over at NFC. You need to copy and paste the same laudatory comment in hundreds of random Xangas that you haven't read. You need to use disgusting humor with a lot of profanity and insult. You need to pretend to care about your readers rights while subverting them to careless carnality.

    OK, granted, the Theologian doesn't do that stuff. I don't know what his secret is. He just asks very topical questions. I recently quit my participation with NFC because I was fed-up with their bullsh**. They became very defensive in a very offensive way. But that is their nature and I wasn't a bit surprized. And now that all this flag nonsense has surfaced, they are among the ones who are sweating the most. Thank-you for not stooping to their level and always having respect for your readers.

    I made a sugestion a long time ago that still might apply. People don't like to actually have to think or wait too long for some instant and easy gratification. Your page has an awful lot going on and takes a long time to load. That could leave people too impatient to bother to read and comment here. I'm actually surprised you've never been "Featured" you surely deserve to be. ~Ben

  • It's true - that's definitely a way to get on Featured Content. You're a brave soul. I could never "post naked." I was actually extremely impressed with the post - the writing Mike, the writing! LOL ... The story cracked me up for some reason - just the way you word things I think. :) I was a nice break from my day.

    Sorry I don't get around to comment much these days. Busy busy busy and exhausted! I still read though! :) Hopefully when we get moved into our new place I will find more time to relax and comment more!

    Hope all is well!

    -MsDezz

  • I was reminded of Inspector Clouseau's visit to "Camp Sunshine " in the movie "Shot in the Dark "

    :laugh:

  • in case you are too embarrassed to leave a comment..LOL!

    Oh this is great!

  • Welcome back, Mike!

    Well, you look pretty good to this ol' girl! Anyway, I've had fun this week with my love story which I started on Monday. My protected post is pretty good! You may like it. I don't think I'll get flagged for it being protected. You're on my list.

    Let's face it, Mike...we are ol' hippies. I prefer being in the buff as well!:lol:

  • this reminds me of david sedaris's Naked.

  • Actually you look pretty good for a guy your age you won't catch me nude on Xanga. Feature content is not worth all that. lol, Judi

  • Well, writing about nudity, let alone illustrating it, is a sure-fire way to get comments! :laugh:

    I probably would see about a nudist camp, given the opportunity. I like to try almost anything once. I'm pretty private, though, so I doubt I would ever become a member or anything. You have certainly lived an interesting life!

    As for whether or not this should be protected...if you're comfortable with it being public, then that's how it should be!

    ~Jenny

  • haha, talk about a shocker...great article. peace out and take care.

    autumn

  • well I'm not too embaressed to leave a comment, but you should know that much about me...I love nudism and miss much of it as I used to go to local camps.

    You look good mike hehe...good thing I'm not there cause I'd probably grope ya just for the hec of it lol..Take care my friend

  • ROTFLMAO!!!!

    I admire your courage.  I hope you make your goal.

  • RYC---i've always associated Sutherland with pod people...ironic that he's NOW head of the pod people in D.C.

    THAT formula for making "featured" wouldn't work for me since the blogmiesters at Xanga Central hate my guts:lol:

  • :eek: lol! what a sport! i've been being hit with the active x thing when i visit and it's been causing my computer to crash which is why i've not been leaving comments. today- it still gave me the box, but didn't crash... so who knows? i've not been on FC and rarely even think about it. i just read, write, and comment and that's enough for me- actually as you know- that's nearly too much and is interferring w/my actual writing lately. that said, i think if you're after FC, one trick is shorter posts. ppl don't want to read much over 800 words. mine tend to run about 1000. i'm not sure how long yours are. i'd guess they average 1200 words or more most of the time. so maybe try shorter more frequent posts. and i love your comments- but totally understand if you don't have time to write them like that! :heartbeat: either way- be happy! :lol:

  • I guess I will try to help you make FC! I have to admit that before I read the story...I wondered why the roll of paper towels were sitting behind you in the picture! LOL!
    Good luck with FC.

  • you should visit my island.. they have an oblation run (guys are naked) every year in one of the universities.... you'll be most welcome... Have a great weekend! hope you don't get cold!

  • ryc: but I thought you'd given up clothes.

  • Actually ^that last comment was me.  Sometimes I foget how I'm logged into xanga.

  • Just as your page downloaded, my boss walked by my desk to see "I'm naked" on my screen.  I quickly scrolled past your picture, in case it revealed more than was appropriate at work.  When she walked away, I scrolled back up and took a peek. 

    Nice book.

  • AHHH Nudity! LOL!!
    ryc: Have you ever seen "As good as it gets"? Good movie, addresses that crack issue.

  • Mike

    Actually Mike I used to go to nudist camps when I lived in Florida in the younger days.  For that matter I am nude while reading your post.  See nudity still abounds.  I will say though that I have not aged as well as you have.  Good Job! 

    Kat

  • i actually have someone special. my post was about some people i know... not my current status of happy.

  • Dear Michael,

    You rock more than me... I admit this!

    :coolman:

    Thanks for the shiny comments on my blog. Good to "see you" up and at it... or... something to that effect...

    :eek:
    Steve :spinning:

  • I didn't thank you yesterday for your citique of my blog.  It is always so helpful, Judi

  • You crack me up. :lol:

  • Michael! What a delightful encounter. :sunny: I think it should be flagged as...well...delightful. It's late, and I'm not being very intelligent!
    *cheers*
    Stacey

  • I just wanted to stop by and tell you that you have a wonderful website -- you have done a great job of putting it all together!

    Have a wonderful weekend!

    Dan Waverly

    omahangh@hotmail.com

    .

  • Dear Mike,

    What can I say but you are BRAVE.  Personally I am very wary of undressing myself, or showing some skin, even at home.  I won't even wear (or own) a pair of shorts.  So, I wouldn't have anything against people who pursue that lifestyle of nudism, but it is surely not for me.

    But, I do feel you should have used a bigger book ...

    Love,
    Liz

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