November 7, 2005

• 

  
  

  The “Regina Poems”

  
  

  The Courtship.

  
  

  BEHIND THE POETRY: I travelled to Nantucket  Island, 3000 miles away on my first lovesearch in 1999. It didnt’ work out.  By November of 99 I had begun another lovesearch and met Regina, an artist in Albequerque, N.M. in November. I created a website for her dedicated to our love. I wrote her poems, and posted them there. Here is one of them. MFN

  
  

  “From a Minstrel to a Queen”
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  1/2/00 8:47am (poetry for Regina)

  
  

  As I gaze upon you, in your regal stance
  Thinking about the love’s last embrace.
  The embrace I held with shaking arms,
  Reaching out to hold your essence with my soul.
  I ponder, I cry to the heavens.
  This is truly a dream come true.
  A dream, a happenstance, a clarion call of the universe.
  I woke up and entered your boudoir,
  You accepted this love with no thought of shame, with no ulterior motive, with no menacing afterthought.
  The love is pure, the feelings override the thoughts, and heaven smiles a bit.
  The words which spilled from me in perpetuity, asking the heavens for solace, have been answered a thousandfold with your purity.
  A Queen smiles on her subject,
  A subject for worship, and daily affirmations of beauty.
  You are with me this day, as I breathe.
  You are with me this moment, as I
  live in your essence.
  I pray to the godhead, let me rest
  knowing thy good graces have
  answered my riddles of love,
  And answered with a call
  that is heard from on high,
  A call which can deafen
  those for whom it is not
  intended.
  But a call which sounds
  soothing and elegant
  when played upon mine ears.
  I awake to meet the Queen.
  And I shall meet, and mate
  with a passion unfelt since
  the stars appeared in the
  Heavens.
  Oh, Queen, the Minstrel
  sings your praises this day,
  And forever.

  
  

  
  “Table For One”
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  Sunday, February 20, 2000 4:25 p.m. pst
   

  
  

  ate lunch in one of my favorite restaurants
  I had an uplifting engrossing and satisfying meal
  I drank some coffee, and had a Bellini Classico
  Which is a wonderful drink containing rum , peach shnappes, and champagne
  The meal was served with Ceasar salad, and the parmesan cheese was fresh
  The Penne Rustica is a house specialty
  It fills me with a warm and wonderful aura
  The lights were dim
  The ambiance special
  Soft music played in the background
  The waiters were prompt, the coffee was filled regularly
  I was hungry when I went in
  But even though the meal filled me as the afternoon passed
  And even though I felt sate and my stomach grew fuller
  There was still an emptiness
  A feeling of empiness
  I look around at the couples enjoying their afternoon
  Whispering and laughing, fulfilling their dreams
  I look across the table at an empty chair
  I leave the restaurant with the emptiness still there
  I want so much for this emptiness to be done
  I am so tired of having to ask for a table for one

  
  

  I want to be with you
  And tell the maitre’d to set up a table for two

  
  

  
  “The Quest”
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  February 26, 2000 (poetry for the Queen, Regina)

  
  

  
  I shall set upon my steed, well fed and sturdy
  As we venture forth through hill and dale
  Ready to clash with dragons, and battle with gnomes
  Who would interfere with the quest
  For the Cup of Life,
  And the bower of the faire maiden Regina,
  The Queen of her world,
  And the recipient of the Minstel’s songs

  
  

  I shall peruse the landscape, and fashion a song of yearning
  I shall gallop at lightning speed, and greet before the
  Long round rook, the object of love’s desire.
  I am on my way to wonderful
  I am rising on Phoenix wings to the castle walls
  I will see the winter tree bud, bloom, and bear fruit

  
  

  The happy end needs a beginning,
  And I begin here, with your thoughts in my heart
  As I depart this world for yours
  For your world is a blessing to me, no matter
  What is or isn’t said
  Your mind is beautiful receptacle for love
  Your heart is pure and white and filled with love
  Your cup, your grail, your very being is full with love

  
  

  I am travelling on a Quest to my Queen
  To feel this love which has only manifested itself in words and thoughts
  To feel this love which caused the oceans to stop rolling
  And the stars to fall out of the sky.
  I shall hereby begin my journey
  The Minstrel shall sing of Love
  And my Queen shall sing in harmony
  And the song shall be sweet and ceremonious
  And we shall soon lie beside the Love of the Heavens
  And my Journey will be at an end.

  
  

  The Meeting

  
  

  
  BEHIND THE POETRY: I flew to Albequerque in March of 2000 to actually meet the new woman of my dreams. Note the time zone is mountain in the timestamp. MFN

  
  

  “The First Day of Spring”
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  March 20, 2000 7:58 p.m. mst

  
  

  
  The search is finally over and the bloom is back on the rose
  My tears have fallen ceaselessly and true love has shown me her face at last
  I cannot find the proper words to express the feelings rampant in my wounded heart
  As it heals with an ointment applied only with the most expert of care
  The time it took to find the springtime seems to have taken forever
  I lay my red and rusty eyes upon the face of love, and beauty means more now
  Than ever wast in all lives past, save that when we, my love and I, existed in memory’s bower
  Alone together without questioning, but that was long ago,
  And now with birds achirping outside her window,
  I go to a place of perpetual springtime,
  Where winter trees lose the frost
  And the hope of summer’s promise is brought by her sweet smile.
  All spring days past are but a blur,
  With resounding music heard only by me
  Yet now Spring’s excellent music can finally be heard by all.
  Because my queen bestows upon me now that pure rare flower of her being,
  And fresh tears fall like subtle rain upon the barren fields of memory,
  The lost forgotten pains of love’s yearning are about to fade forever from feeling
  The hole is wholly filled and beauty, truth, and passion cry a clarion call for me.
  Words are simply not enough to puncture the happiness and elemental belonging that I feel.
  Words can only hint at the purity with which my muse empowers me.
  I knew her, yes, but we have never coupled till now,
  As Spring bursts forth in a fever of growing, garroulous goodness,
  And as the words fall like rain from my lips,
  Praising and pursuing the pulchritudinous visage which has been shown me,
  I will stop, rest upon the path of perfection,
  And blow a kiss to my Queen.
  SPRING forth and let me love, as never have I loved
  Life has never been filled with as much beauty as now I behold in her presence.

  
  

  The End

  
  

  
  BEHIND THE POETRY: I flew out again in April and in May I bought a one way ticket to New Mexico. We drove back to California together. She owned a duallie truck and a 35 foot travel trailer, in which she lived. I secured trailer space in a mobile home park in Long Beach, where I work. Regina couldn’t find employment. She finally confessed to me that she owed the IRS over 10 grand in unpaid taxes. I found it hard keeping up rent on both my house and the trailer. (She was supposed to get a job and we would live in separate spaces until we got to know each other better. Since she didn’t have cash, I ended up paying for everything. My savings disappeared in two months.) By July, she decided to move back to New Mexico. This is the poem I wrote after our breakup. We’re still in touch, and she promises to pay me back the money she owes me someday. She had to work out an “arrangement with the gov’t by the way.

  
  

  
  “Confessional”
  Poetry by Michael F. Nyiri
  Tuesday, July 25, 2000 6:55 p.m. pdt

  
  

  
  I can’t seem to get the faucet to turn off.
  try to be ‘normal’ talk it out, reason prevails.
  the tears, a waterfall down my cheeks
  my eyes hurt
  that constricting feeling in my throat
  can’t get it all to stop

  
  

  I really don’t know why this is, but then I do.
  In two days my dream will end,
  even though it almost turned into a nightmare.

  
  

  and it was a nightmare for you.

  
  

  the time was only a short moment
  A feeling of ecstasy’s revelation
  but the reality wasn’t the fantasy
  we can’t live in the dream
  while it goes bad
  demons haunt the very love we posess

  
  

  believe me I understand
  I am a rock when it comes to understanding
  but I am a rock of unforseen circumstance
  when it comes to you
  there are uncertainties which chip at my granite
  there are incalculable errors which are made
  with each breath I take

  
  

  I wanted to peek inside your perfection
  I wished to walk beside the waters of your soul
  Pretty words paint such pretty pictures
  I saw you painting our future
  I saw me involving us in a bower of beauty

  
  

  But I was blind
  we are in the real world, and we didn’t consider the
  pitfalls
  we are pragmatists but we didn’t realize that love is not
  a glue
  you will do what you have to do
  I will survive and so will you
  but it doesn’t stop the torrent
  and it doesn’t stop the pain

  
  

  and through it all I know your pain is
  a thousandfold worse than mine.
  through it all you deserve more than
  I can or could offer
  you are that special perfection which can only
  be attained by those who have achieved nirvana
  and I still have a long path to tread.

  
  

  do I know for whom I cry tonight
  for the misbegotten world and the broken
  future in it’s plight?
  words will pour like tears from my red
  and burning eyes
  and the embers of emotion
  shall escape, forgotten sighs

  
  

  do I cry for you, for your perfection, and your spirit?
  do I cry for me, misunderstanding, and ill dreams?
  we do not blame, for this I pray in ecstasy
  that we will connect sometime in the future

  
  

  when you gave me the ‘news’
  I felt I could take it,
  that you are perfectly right and
  time has leavened perfection with purpose
  I felt that everything would be all right
  and I still do
  and I ache for you
  and I love you more for this

  
  

  you never wanted trouble or disdain
  you never wanted indecision or pain
  I never wanted the dream to end
  and you made me wake up today

  
  

  I can only thank you
  you know,
  as the leaky faucet behind my eyes goes unfixed
  I can only thank you for your
  steadfastness in knowing the proper
  way to correct a situation which
  could spiral us into oblivion
  both you
  and me

  
  

  us

  
  

  the best way now for us to survive is for you to go back
  to the home you called before you met me

  
  

  we still can connect through the magic monitor
  and our happiness shall maintain us
  even as our corporeal selves disconnect and continue our
  lives apart

  
  

  we have tasted the universal
  you have seen your creativity enhanced
  even as your self esteem has eroded
  I believe I know now that I can
  never be the person I want to be in
  my poetry
  and that poetry isn’t life
  I know that again

  
  

  I hope the poetry in our existence together is not in vain
  I will always love you,
  and we will try this again someday in eternity

  
  

  my faucet is broken my dear
  and I know you don’t like it when I cry……..

  
  

  
  POET’S NOTE: Everything comes to an end, in time.  MFN

  
  

  
  

  ---

  
  

  
  

  
  
  
  
  
  

  34.

  THIS IS THE INTERNET ISLAND BLOGRING TOPIC POST #1.00 Welcom… Total eProps: 46 | Total Comments: 31 Posted by baldmike2004 – 11/6/2005 at 9:00 PM

  
  

   I thought this was pretty neat. I check the main page of Xanga occasionally, and I just copied this off the Featured Content page. This hopefully will mean that more “islanders” will be applying for passports on the Internet Island.

  
  

  I will shortly list The First Topic Post entries as soon as I get home from work. (The participants have posted their links in the comments section of the Topic Post. The Island is NOT an attempt to get anyone on Featured but if you like the idea (I sure do) then perhaps this ring will drive more readers to your site. I’ll be visiting as many of my members, both those I already know, and the good amount of new members who have joined as soon as I get home. This had already been an overwhelming experience for me. To Create a ring on Friday night, get 61 members in only three days, and get my first topic entry on Featured Content on the Xanga front page. Hmmmmmm.

  
  

  We might have to build a bigger boat!
  

  ---

  Edit: 6:45 p.m. ATTENTION: INTERNET ISLAND BLOGRING members. Please enter your post info on the Topic Post here. Not on subsequent posts on my blog. (like this one)  This way, other blogring members only have to go to one entry to see who has posted. Thank you. The link to that entry is under the header.  MFN

  • 6:00 pm
  • 31 Comments