October 27, 2005
-
The Book of Love
an essay by Michael F. Nyiri prepared for the blogring The Socrates Cafe
No background materials were used in the preparation of this essay. Other articles and entries concerning the subjects of both "Love" and "Death" can be accessed on Simone de Beauvoir's site.
Love is the diaphanous thread that connects each of our souls to the Universal Mind. It is a fickle and misunderstood concept, maligned and embraced, pondered perhaps too much, and yet dismissed sometimes before it's time arrives fully in bloom.
There are myriad "types" of emotions that we humans identify as "love", some "true", some "false" and some "mystical" but all tend, in the end analysis, to serve as our connection to each other on some ethereal plane that is almost unknowable or undefinable while we experience it, yet each one of us knows instinctively when we "feel" it.
Immediately upon hearing about "love", we either think first about inter-relational love, between two people, familial love, between two members of the same family, or all-encompassing love, between one soul and humanity. We can also love a 'thing' or an experience, so "love" becomes an active verb for some relating to a positive feeling received during good times and favored activities.
All major religions preach "love" even as they attempt to deny and destroy their enemies. In fact, most religions and philosophical processes embrace the idea of love for one's neighbor and enemy. Love is trumpeted as a cure all to many societal ills. "All you need is love." "Love your enemies as you would yourself."
Yet for all mankind's attempted embrace of the concept, throughout history, love takes a backseat to her sister hate, perhaps another side of the coin, so to speak, but perhaps just another strong emotional reaction to this slender thread of circumstance that essentially connects each and every one of us.
A "common man" will respond to idea of love with affection and care. A dictionary definition of the term will state that love is a "strong and deep feeling of affection." First one has affection for someone or thing, and the next step would be "love" or a "deep affection." I believe love is more than "just an affection" no matter how strong. This is what makes love a fickle concept. Love, like beauty, art, and intelligence, exists. It is ingrained in all of us. The degrees to which we claim to "feel" it or "experience" it's "charms" is what makes us "human" in our corporeal existence. One more sliver of humanity that defines us.
When a mother gives birth, she "loves" her child. That some mothers can suffer post partum depression and even attempt to snuff the child's life illustrates for us that this "flip side" of the "coin" of love and hate can seem tenuous at best. A man can love a woman with "all his heart" but he can become enraged with jealousy and attempt to hurt and maim that love of his, in the person of his woman, if he believes she is "cheating" on him. Familial love is fraught with instances of disownings and denials of the emotion, when two members of the family disagree strongly. For every postitve idea of love, there is an equal and opposite negative, or "hate" reaction. Any "Book" of "Love" has to understand that the "Physics" of love are undeniably linked, and we probably couldn't "define" love without a "definition" of it's opposite emotion "hate".
Is it "hate" that causes fights and bickering, and eventual harm among "lovers"? Or is this love emotion so intertwined, as the oriental idea of yin and yang, with it's sister hate, that it inspires this opposite reaction in almost all cases, in almost all kinds of people, throughout history?
Perhaps. Because "love" is our inner string of connection with humanity, combining and separating us, all of our foibles and fallacies concerning the emotion are just as strong and deeply felt. Yes, I believe we can love and hate at the same time. Bleeding the hate, while retaining the love, should be our quest while we exist in this plane.
In the Universal, attained by our "souls" after our death, all "hate" and "love", just as "past" and "future", combine and coalesce, and in our "final realization" we finally understand why the dichotomies of corporeal existence are almost given to us, like the gift of a mammoth puzzle, while we walk the Earth.
As one attains enlightenment, one understands the connection of "love" and is able to "love" his neighbor and his enemy with as much brio as he loves his family and his paramours. This "thread" is a flimsy one, and is apt to break, and does with ease. But with time and understanding it can also mend as if it were never broken.
If each soul looks deep into himself, then he will understand that love lies deep within. Love permits each one of us to appreciate our existence, and to interconnect with our fellow man. If we bleed hate from the love experience, our love is infinitely more "pure" and overcoming. We should be able to respond in kind to the sight of newborn child, seemingly innocent of all societal fearmongering and prejudice, whether that child is our own, our neighbor's, or our enemy's. He is the same child, filled with love and deep affection, until he is "taught" the dichotomies of existence by his society.
Deep within us lies our connection with each other. That connection is best defined by the simple word: "LOVE."
I wrote a poem in 1973, when I was 20 years old, in response to a popular single pane newspaper cartoon of the time entitled "Love is..." Each pane would present some "cutesey" phrase, accompanied by naked cherublike "big eyed" kids. I used to cringe when I saw this cartoon in the newspaper, and my poem was an "answer" to the cartoon series.
"Love is..."
Poetry by Michael F.Nyiri
Jan. 3, 1973
I Of all the world, or the people in it -
They said everyone had a mate
II The lovebirds sit on their perch
and sing
III What is love? he asked of the woman
Sixty-five grey hair fur coat
Love is...found a quote in a newspaper
What is love? he asked of the girl
Blonde hair nice figure cheerleader
Love is...found a quote in a newspaper
IV Someone gets famous
for attempting to define
That which cannot be defined
Love is...nothing unless both feel it
at the same time - radiance seeping
through to the inner soul - warmth
telling her that he is there
forever - and vice versa
Love is...touch - grasping each other's
emotions through the facades they put up -
feeling for imperfections in the
soul and not caring superficially
Love is caring, wanting, expressing,
movement, losses, quarrels, agreements,
making up - and breaking up
Love is a paper both parties have
to sign
V Love is young and old and eternal
The old men say love is blind
The young women say it is
Something old something new
Something borrowed something blue
Love is relationships - letters in a
drawer - names carved on a tree -
sitting together in the rain - smiling
VI Love isn't a quote in a newspaper
Love isn't "cute"
Love is real and hard and heartbreaking
Love is lonely and miserable
Love is waiting for a phone to ring
for two weeks - waiting for a
letter to arrive - waiting for a
kind word - or a premonition
Love is...unkind sometimes
VII Love is...two little children playing in
the mud
Love is...the very first kiss
Love is...sleeping together
Love is...something that can't be
described...
Love is...
Period
The image at the top of this essay is a photocomposite featuring me as the "White Knight" beside my white horse, and is the lead image on my "Lovesearch" website on AllThingsMike. Please visit the "Lovesearch" to read about my "Search for Love" on the internet during 1999 and 2000.
Comments (100)
love is when you want to be with someone bc of their warts and faults not in spite of them! :spinning:
I'm struggling with Love or the thought/potential of love. I'm struggling with it not culminating like I think it should with a certain person. I am absorbed and I don't want to be. Young or old..it's always there. I like this...
Love isn't a quote in a newspaper
Love isn't "cute"
Love is real and hard and heartbreaking
Love is lonely and miserable
Love is waiting for a phone to ring
for two weeks - waiting for a
letter to arrive - waiting for a
kind word - or a premonition
Love is...unkind sometimes
Hugs...nanalana:heartbeat:
Mike ,one thing I love about Socrate's Cafe is that it is a personal challenge,,,in other words..not to convinve others as much as to take an idea as far as you can to your own satisfaction..and to be willing to modify your thinking. Which is why I apprciate comments like yours. I understand how you can say you love evryone after reading your post...perhaps my definition is too narrow. I am sure I have the capacity to love any individual on the planet if given time and opportunity to know them, but in the larger sense i remain too primitive in my formation to even begin to love the whole.
I also love this and I quote you...".All major religions preach "love" even as they attempt to deny and destroy their enemies..... In fact, most religions and philosophical processes embrace the idea of love for one's neighbor and enemy. Love is trumpeted as a cure all to many societal ills. "All you need is love." "Love your enemies as you would yourself."
Yet for all mankind's attempted embrace of the concept, throughout history, love takes a backseat to her sister hate."... this is exactly why I remain unchurched...well said. Thanks for visiting and reading and thinking....Mia Lucia
What a fabulous photo! I love it! Okay, you're all posted, but I will have to return to read. This week, I'm encouraging everyone to visit the other sites and question each other. Thanks for joining us!
Dear Mike,
You have some interesting views on love. Though, you already are aware that I hate to use the term for it is man made. The feeling of "love" cannot be encompassed in one word as you have stated here. And yet I also feel and believe it has no opposite either. "Hate", in my opinion, is not the opposite of "love" at all. "Love" has no opposite, and if "hate" springs forth from a supposed feeling of "love" then it wasn't "love" to begin with.
Liz
Mike, once again, you've outdone yourself. You've qualified that you did not use any outside sources, and here you've given us a very convincing argument of the universality of love. Your poem is a very nice compliment to the post, although I'm not sure about love having to be so painful. Why do we associate so much pain with love? From personal experience, I'm not sure that's a good thing about our culture. Last thing, (assuming that love and hate are yin and yang, as you've said) how do we "bleed hate" so that we may experience this universal love? It sounds so easy, so why is it so hard for us to DO (especially as a world community)?
Interesting post. I believe love is always within us, to share, or not to share, it just is. Hate is a frightful word. If the love is already within us, how would we be capable of hating? Hating is a learned thing, it is not in our capacity to know it, unless taught.
You're right in that love is a fickle, often misunderstood thing. When I was reading your post, I thought of what you were saying when families disown certain members over arguments. I think that is on the same level of religions promoting love of one's neighbor but then also condoning the destruction of infidels.
From what does love spring? Affection? Or is it acceptance? After reading your post, I would think that love is viewed, in the romantic sense, as deep affection, but really is (near) total acceptance in many cases. If we can (nearly) absolutely accept someone/something then it is love. The question, "Does she accept you, warts and all?" comes to mind.
Just one thought and some questions. I need to really think about this some more. I think the other question is much much easier to tackle because it involves a moment, which we all will share but cannot know. Love, on the other hand, is something nearly all of us share but do not really understand.
What a wonderful and different way to look at the question. Props to you!!!
Love it! "Deep within us lies our connection with each other. That connection is best defined by the simple word: "LOVE." , this is great, what a different point of view...
Please note that this is now my second comment on your site, however, I have been here several times, I just didn't leave a comment!...sorry.
I have gone into your "love quest" site and love that as well. Finding love on the internet?....hmmmm, sort of like "E-Harmony?"...That never works!...Actually, that comment was actually "tongue in cheek", and to find out why you will need to read my next post! hahaha
Sir Michael, you will note that this is my 3rd comment, (OK, I know that it is back to back, but that should count! lol
Hey! I enjoyed everything ...from the pictures to the music & the words to ponder! I Especially like the word pictures ........"a flimsy thread, apt to break"....good stuff, thanks for posting!
:goodjob:
You did a good job, you talked about all sorts of love.
And the poem is wonderful, I love it.
I think love is just what it is love.
Do you think love comes to us(romantiic) more than once on a lifetime?
Peace and Love:)
Mike,
I found it! hahahaha, I knew that if you went back far enough you would find my name! lol thanks for all of the nice compliments...I did figure that you lived near, or at least in SO CAL. I live in Orange, near the circle, I love old town, since I love all things old! lol
By the way, love the Dean Martin song you have featured, one of my all time favorites. Just a heads up, todays post has been inspired by your website, or "love quest"....
Alicia
Good poem...cool artwork...and you get MAJOR props for playing Dean. You smooth-smoothie. :goodjob:
Love is..period.
Classic ! :goodjob:
:goodjob:Truly enjoyed reading your thoughts on this. The correlation between love and hate is something I didn't tackle, although I believe exists. If one doesn't care, they can not hate, it is apathy. Hence I agree, that in order to hate, one must love. Thank you for articulating it so nicely.
This is an absolutely beautiful blog! I particularly like this line:
"Love is the diaphanous thread that connects each of our souls to the Universal Mind"
I think it is so true that love is connection. As I was reading, I was also thinking that love is not so very different from hate, and then you made that very point! Do you think that hate is what happens to love when too much stress is applied? I feel that way sometimes.
Wishing you a happy weekend :wave:
I am much better at experiencing it than defining it!
I love your graphic...brilliant!
:sunny:thanks for dropping by my site... I enjoyed your post... reminds me of the Wonder Years...
Blessings,
kim
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